Our Little Addition

Noah's 1st Car

2012-01-08T06:44:00.000-08:00

I can't believe how long it's been since my last post. I hope to be able to update soon with a flashback, but for now, I thought I'd post a video too large to email, that captures Noah's excitement at getting his "Lightning Queen" car, a gift from Uncle Lou this past Christmas morning. On this January 8, we are having beautiful weather and I am looking forward to giving Noah his wish, which he vocalized loudly in watching this video a moment ago, by taking him out for a drive in his very own car.

Our crazy boy

2011-05-15T04:33:00.001-07:00

As Noah is growing bigger and bigger in size, we watch as his personality grows at an even faster pace. Just a quick pic of our crazy little boy and a fun video which really captures what a happy little guy (and a little general) he can be.

Mackie & Me

2011-05-07T19:13:00.001-07:00

This morning I woke to find out that my dog, Mac, passed away late last night surrounded by my family in New York. I spent most of today feeling sad and thinking about all he had meant to me. I took the kids to the park this afternoon to get out of the house and clear my head. It was a beautiful day outside and all I could think of was how much Mac would have loved it. How he would have been sitting in the grass with his paws crossed like a gentleman, with his nose tipped up into the wind, the little white patch on his chin, the bump on his head, his sad brown eyes. It is difficult to imagine I will never see him again. That we will never share a day like this again this side of heaven. It's been so long since we have.

My sister and I brought Mac home when he was just a little puppy. We chose him because his head was bigger than his body and because of his sad eyes. We thought it funny that we would have a boy in a house that had for so long been "girls only" including all our pets. He was trouble from the start. Mostly, he was misunderstood. If you didn't really know him- if you had only heard about his antics- you would have never known what a good boy he could be. But he was. He looked out for all of us. It is true what they say. There are some pets who are more loyal than people.

Mac was my buddy through so many seasons of life, mostly the really rough ones. After my back surgery, I remember how he'd crawl up into my bed each night and lay there. He'd keep watch over me all night long unaware that most nights he made it very hard for me to get physically comfortable. Still, it was a comfort to have him by my side. When I decided to move to Virginia, he seemed to feel almost betrayed. He sat for days next to my suitcase as though he knew it meant I was leaving him. This picture always makes me laugh because it fully depicts how my pets took it when I decided to move out on my own. Mac was so angry that he chewed the wood right off of the wall. While I was away, I was told, he slept on the floor in my room day after day, waiting to see if I would come back. I didn't for a very long time. The next time I returned for a short visit, he wanted nothing to do with me. Would barely look at me. Would growl and "side look" me if I so much as said his name. I know it sounds silly but ask anyone in my family and they will tell you the same thing. He never forgave me for leaving him. He held a grudge.

Through it all, Mac always had his "wife" Lucy by his side. From the start they were inseparable. I'll always remember when we decided to split them up - when Mac went away for a while - and the day Lucy watched Mac being taken away. As he walked away, being led by his leash down the stairs, she blinked her eyes and then threw up all over the floor in front of the glass door to our porch. But it was not long before I heard his heavy footsteps like horse hooves galloping through the house. He ran up the stairs and pounced on me in my bed, licking my face. The only one more overjoyed than Mac was Lucy. Regardless of the fact that they lived apart these past few years, they were inseparable until the day he died.

The last time I saw Mac, I had no reason to believe it would be the last time. He held my hand like old times but he still wouldn't really look me in the eye. He let me rub his head and talk to him without growling but it only lasted a few minutes before he walked away and threw himself on the floor with a big huff. I joked with my family that it was progress. I said "Goodbye Mackie," careful not to inflect my voice to the sing-song level that seemed to open old wounds and caused him to growl. I rubbed the bump on the top of his head glad that we were making improvement.

Noah was fascinated with both my dogs from the moment he first saw them. He was so enamored with all of our pets that Michael and I decided to take my 19 year old cat, Trixie, back to Virginia with us for him this past October. It's hard to believe that my cat, who still looks so much like a kitten in her old age, has seen me through graduating middle school, high school, college, law school, getting married, having a baby - all of it.

Trixie, we called "the general." She always kept Mac in line. They had a rivalry between them that never ceased to crack me up. There were times when they would just "stand off" against each other, staring each other down to see who would falter first. It was always Mac. I still remember little Trixie with her claw-less paws slapping Mac's face repeatedly, like a prized fighter holding nothing back. He stood there and took it as though he did not understand that he was 10 times her size and capable of putting her in her place with so little effort. Although he had his wild moments, he was oddly polite. Although I was a little nervous as to how Mac would react to Noah, he was always very gentle with him, despite his misgivings towards me that he'd carried throughout his life.

I always said I would never get another pet again after having lost my first Boston Terrier Baby. I didn't want to have to deal with that kind of pain again. Noah is so fond of dogs and loved Mac, Lucy and Trixie, but the thought of putting him through that kind of loss gave me pause. Still, I know this is a part of life and though I'm sad, tonight I try to be grateful. Grateful that these pets, who were such a large part of my childhood and younger days got to be a part of Noah's. What a great blessing.

RIP Mackie. I love you.

Noah's 2nd Easter

2011-04-23T14:54:00.000-07:00

It's hard to believe how much our little boy has grown in the last year. I remember last Easter like it was yesterday. We were living in Leesburg and Noah was 8 months old, the age when he started to get very mobile. Even at 8 months, he was ever the ham. I took a bunch of pictures of him in Vanessa's room, using her bedspread as a backdrop. I was so glad that I was able to get some great pictures of both kids but then never got around to doing anything with them. Looking back on them today, I could hardly believe the difference I see in both Noah and Vanessa. What a difference a year makes!

This year, Noah is 20 months old and Vanessa is one month shy of her 11th birthday. Just yesterday (it seems) she was 5 years old, playing makeup and collecting panda bears, pushing our heads together announcing "you may now kiss the bride." Now, she is a beautiful young lady, soon to be in junior high. As of this weekend, she has also officially surpassed me in height. Big shock there, I'm sure. This year she is old enough to understand the meaning of the Easter season and what we celebrate on Resurrection Sunday in a much more meaningful way than she did before.

This year, to commemorate Good Friday, Michael, Vanessa and I watched The Passion of the Christ while Noah slept. It was a powerful reminder of Christ's sacrifice on the cross and it provided a great opportunity for us to discuss the Bible and help Vanessa's understanding of Jesus to become less abstract.

This morning, I took Noah and Vanessa to have their pictures taken down the street from our apartment and then this afternoon, Michael, Vanessa and I did a Bible Study before he had to take Vanessa back. It was definitely the most meaningful celebration we have ever had as a family, albeit low-key. I hope it will become as much as a tradition for our family as decorating Easter eggs, eating chocolate bunnies or hoarding marshmallow Peeps has been.

The last time we did not have Vanessa on Easter Sunday we also had her for the preceding Friday and Saturday. That was the weekend I found out that Noah was a boy via ultrasound. That day too feels like it was just yesterday. I had decorated the "nursery" of our South Riding townhouse in blue and assembled a blue Easter basket for Vanessa which included the blue bunny Noah is holding in the above photos from last Easter.

Tomorrow morning Michael will be playing for 3 services, starting with the Sunrise Service at McLean Bible Church's Prince William campus. Unfortunately, we will be away from our church family, but I am excited to see the new campus and worship with my husband. This Easter we will not be celebrating with either of our families, as we did last year, either, but I am grateful that we have such wonderful friends who have opened up their home to us.

In spite of everything going on right now in our lives, despite situations and circumstances which make it seemingly impossible to feel peace or joy, I am trying to focus on the weight of Jesus' sacrifice on the cross, trying to keep my eyes on Him and not be distracted by the details and worries of life that I often give too much importance to anyway. That's what this season and this holiday we celebrate is really all about.

"For God so loved the world that He gave His only Begotten Son that whosoever should believe in Him should never die, but have eternal life." (John 3:16)

"But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5:8)

"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy He has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead..." (1 Peter 1:3)

(Listen: Christ is Risen From the Dead - Matt Maher)

Welcome Spring

2011-04-17T10:09:00.000-07:00

"It was one of those March days when the sun shines hot and the wind blows cold: when it is summer in the light, and winter in the shade." ~Charles Dickens

Michael, Noah and I are still at Tom and Sue's enjoying a weekend visit after having been away for quite some time due to everyone being sick. This past winter was not anywhere near as treacherous as the winter before, which was marked with one snow storm after another that buried us on the mountain in Leesburg. Nevertheless, we could not be happier to be welcoming the warm weather and beautiful colors of Spring. It is especially nice that this year, Noah is walking around and able to experience in a much more meaningful way than he did last year.

We just got back after enjoying some of this beautiful spring(ish) weather. I think the above quote captures perfectly the kind of day it is today. Noah had a blast picking dandelions and dragging Sue and I up and down this beautiful Stephen's City neighborhood. We had to practically drag him back to the house in order to wash the yellow stains left from flower-picking off his hands.

I was able to capture a few photos of him on Michael's phone. Though he has grown so much from the last post on here containing pictures, he has remained a constant ham. Glad I could share his sweet smile with you today.

Catching Up

2011-04-16T18:32:00.001-07:00

It's hard to believe that the last time I updated this blog was when Noah was 5 months old. Nearly 15 months later, my once floppy baby is a rambunctious toddler with a huge sense of humor, a strong will and an unlimited supply of energy. Although I have surely neglected to keep up with blogging my baby and although many months will unfortunately remain unaccounted for, I am resolved to pick up blogging again.

To provide a very brief update: Noah turns 20 months on the 25th. He is walking (more often running) and talking up a storm. He amazes me everyday with what he's picking up (and often throwing -- pun intended). He is sweet and stubborn as can be, eager to give affection and intent on having everything precisely his way. And though my days are often marked with tantrums, which have a wide range in duration, they are also filled with laughter. I love being a mom.

Apart from being a mom, I also work full-time now in my first post-law school job, in a career I love and one which has a great future, so long as I passed the Bar, which for the next 20 days it to be determined. Life has surely been more hectic than I ever could have imagined and some days as of late have been very hard to bear. Adversity has touched every corner of my family. My mother-in-law, who I love as though she were my own mom, was recently diagnosed with small cell lung carcinoma. While the cancer has been hard on her body, her heart is still as big as ever. As I type, she and Noah are laughing and playing as though cancer had never touched her. I am so grateful for her and miss the days when we all lived under one roof and she was as big a part of raising Noah as Michael and I were. At times like this, living so far away is surely hard. This past Thursday, my 88-year-old Ma fell and broke her hip while doing something as ordinary as frying an egg. Her life, too, has changed overnight and I know the road ahead will be long. I'm incredibly grateful that Noah and I were able to visit her in Florida just last month. At times like this it's so hard to be apart from my family and I am reminded of how important family is. I pray daily for healing for them and for the division and brokenness in all three of my families and trust that God is big and capable enough to answer.

Unfortunately, I am not at home and do not have access to any recent pictures to post. But I'm hopeful that I will find the time to do so soon. I look forward to sharing more of our life with Noah with those of you who have followed our journey as parents. It certainly makes the distance between us seem a lot easier to bridge.

5 Months old (on Monday)

2010-01-22T09:10:00.000-08:00

It's been way too long since I've updated the blog. Now that I've ended my ban on social networking, I have been posting so many pictures that I forget sometimes that I have this to maintain! Noah has gotten SO big. He is already 18lbs and in size 4 diapers and he babbles up a storm and jumps for hours in his jumperoo everyday (his favorite activity in the world aside from laughing hysterically with his daddy!). His little personality comes through more and more everyday and though his reflux is still a problem and his sleeping is still not on any kind of schedule, he is doing really great! He has become such a happy little boy and he really is such a joy to have. This is a new development so here's to hoping the happy stage lasts! (Hoping it NEVER ends!) He is starting to teeth so I imagine that it won't be long before he gets grumpy again... So for now, I'm just taking it all in! Time has FLOWN. My little bitty baby is getting to be such a big boy!
Michael and I are both now back to school and trying to juggle our schedules as best as we can. It's been an adjustment for me after being home with him 24/7 for the last 5 months but I'm survivng. I can't tell you how forward I look to getting home to see his little smiling face and those big cheeks waiting for me! One last semester and I will be a law school graduate. I've got my eyes on the prize lol

At Noah's 4 month appointment he weighed in a little under 18lbs and measured 26.5 inches. He's growing so fast! On the doctor's advice we started him on rice cereal which he did not like (though he really loved eating the empty spoon) but it seemed to aggravate his tummy so for now he's exclusively nursing.

Oh... and how can I foget to mention Noah's First Christmas? My family came in from New York and we had the best Christmas Eve dinner ever. Ma's teaching seems to have paid off, though we missed her VERY much. For Christmas, Noah got his very first Elmo. He was not such a happy boy that day lol His reaction was not quite what we'd hoped it would be! (see video).

Fortunately they are now the best of friends! Below are some more great pics from the holidays to date. Hope you enjoy!

Catching up - The best shots!

2009-12-19T09:54:00.000-08:00

It's been far too long since I've updated this site and so today, while we are all snowed in (save Michael who somehow trecked through a foot of snow and quite dangerous conditions to go to work, trooper that he is), I will try my best to get as much up here as I can. Below are a batch of some of the best shots we've taken of our rapidly growing little boy who will be four months old on Christmas day and is somehow getting ready to start donning 12 month sized clothes! How much our little one has grown and grown up! He now has great control over his hands. He plays with his toys (his favorite are his glow worm and worm rattle - posts on that to come soon). He gets such a kick playing on his playmat! He has also discovered his feet and went so far the other night to put his foot into his mouth! He has a whole vocabulary of words like "agoo" which he can say with various inflections and ennunciations as well as early versions of "mama" and "dada" which are so precious. He is such a little character!

He still LOVES bathtime and loves it even more now that he has learned to splash which is always fun (until clean up time comes!) :) And he gets such a great big kick out of his jumperoo!

But the most exciting milestone to date is that Noah has found his laugh! I am not as talented at Michael as getting him to go into full-on belly laughs but I do get some good laughs when I sing him Christmas carols (his favorite is my mish-mashed version of Holly Jolly Christmas and Frosty the Snowman during which "thumpidy thump thump" occurrs every other verse lol). He also laughs when I tell him that "mommy is going to eat his feet" before I gobble them up. But when Michael has Noah on his lap, he just gets absolutely hysterical. I was so thrilled to capture this laughing fit on video a week or so ago! Whenever I am sad I play this back for myself and it always makes my day. Enjoy!

Aunt Chrissy & Uncle Anthony's Wedding

2009-12-19T09:27:00.000-08:00

During the first week in November, we took our first family road trip up to New York to be in Aunt Christine and Uncle Anthony's wedding. The night before the wedding, Noah stayed in his first Park Avenue hotel in the big city and the day of the wedding he got to wear his very first tux. He looked very handsome! Aunt Christine could not have looked more beautiful. Noah also got to spend lots of time with Aunt Michy who could not get over how big he had gotten since the last time she saw him. While in NY, Noah was surrounded by lots of beautiful women who could not wait to shower him with affection! Sadly, I don't have many pictures (how I don't have a shot of the bride and groom is beyond me) but when I get more I will surely post them!

3 Months Old Today!!!

2009-11-25T19:05:00.001-08:00

more photos to come...

Happy Halloween!!!!

2009-10-31T13:26:00.001-07:00

Good Grief, it's Noah's First Halloween! He's been a fussy boy today but we managed to get some photos of him in his costume where he is not crying lol. No trick or treating this year sad to say. Better luck next year!

HAPPY HALLOWEENIE!!!!

Love, Noah

2 Months Doctor's Visit

2009-10-30T08:44:00.001-07:00

On the date of Noah's two month milestone, the two of us had a lot to celebrate and we did so by watching the Yankees seal the deal to play in their first world series since I moved to Virginia. Noah stayed in my arms the whole time and had lots of big grins to display as I bounced him in celebration each time the Yankees did something good. We have had a lot of fun watching the games together. :)

Yesterday, however, was not so fun. It was the day I've been dreading for weeks: Noah's first round of shots. Michael came with me and thank God he did because it was a truly awful experience for Noah -- and for me.

Amazingly, this was the first time Noah has been to the doctor where he wasn't screaming. Michael did a wonderful job with him and he was extremely calm the entire time. He was weighed, measured, and examined from head to toe and there were no tears. Then the doctor left the room for us to wait for the nurse to come in with the shots. Noah sat on his daddy's lap so peacefully and having no clue what he was in for. It just made me feel so sad.

The nurse came in and had Michael lay Noah down on the table and then asked him to hold down Noah's arms. I could see Noah's little face all happy and unsuspecting and then at rapid speed, the nurse began stabbing his chubby thighs. I wish to God I had not watched and that I could stop replaying it in my mind. With the first shot, Noah's happy face turned bright red and by the second he was crying out. By the third and forth he was absolutely hysterical and screaming louder than I've ever heard him scream before (and believe me, I've heard him scream a lot). As soon as the nurse was done, I ran to him and picked him off the table and just held him as close to me as I could while he wailed and wailed and wailed. The nurse joked that I was as red as he was but it didn't seem very funny at the moment. I was able to calm Noah down enough to get him to nurse for a few seconds but he was pretty inconsolable and eventually cried all the way home in the car. It was heartbreaking. I tried telling myself that it's for his own good but it's so hard to believe that when you see your baby go from being so happy, trusting and content to being so unhappy and in pain. I know it sounds silly (because deep down I do know that it's a necessary evil) but it felt like betrayal. I just thank God it will be another two months before he is subject to that again. :(

Aside from Noah getting his needles, we also got some new stats to report!

Noah is almost 14 pounds and is 2 feet tall! He is in the 90th percentile for both height and weight. (At his first visit he was 75th for height and 50th for weight.) He certainly takes after his daddy! And of course, I've had to laugh that at 2 months old, Noah is almost half my height. (ha ha).

Here is a quick glimpse of how our little guy has progressed:

Birth: 7lbs, 6oz
1 Week: under 7lbs
2 Weeks: 7lbs, 12 oz
3 Weeks: 8lbs, 12 oz
4 Weeks: 9lbs, 10 oz
6 Weeks: 11lbs, 8 oz
7 Weeks: 12lbs, 7 oz
9 Weeks: 13lbs, 7 oz

As for Noah's reflux, it continues to be a big problem. He is still very fussy and obviously uncomfortable and there seems to be so very little that we can do to make it better. Once again, the doctor adjusted the dosing on his medications. For the time being, we are keeping him on the Zantac and we are also going to try some natural remedies to see if they will give him any comfort. I look forward to the day when we can stop giving him medicine altogether. I hope that day comes soon...

2 Months Old Today!!

2009-10-25T16:10:00.000-07:00

It's so hard to believe that two months have passed since we first met our baby boy, but the date on the calendar tells me it's true.

In these two short months our little boy has grown SO much and developed such a personality. Each day that passes shows more growth on so many levels. From his reactions to little things he didn't notice before to the sweet sounds he makes when he has "conversations" with us, he is just a little joy in so many ways.

Sadly, as sweet and wonderful a baby as he is, Noah has been having a very hard time with his reflux. On the 16th, he had to go back to the pediatrician to get checked out and have his medicine adjusted. I was shocked to learn that at just 7 weeks, Noah was almost 13 lbs! (12lbs, 7 oz to be exact). Given that he had gained 3lbs since starting his medicine a few weeks earlier, it was necessary to more than double his dose. (We're obviously thrilled that he's not losing weight as a result.) Unfortunately, upping his medicine has not shown any relief in our little boy. He seems to cry constantly and there is very little we can do to console him. These days it seems that Noah is either being held, eating, sleeping or crying.

Though it feels like a desperate situation most of the time, Noah does have his moments where he is all smiles and full of laughter -- particularly when his daddy spins the fan for him, which has him watching with wide eyes and a huge grin! As soon as the fan stops, he sticks his lower lip out in a full on pout. It is the cutest thing. (He is laughing at the fan as I sit here typing as Michael is distracting him from the fact that I'm doing something other than holding or feeding him!)

Today to celebrate Noah's two month milestone, we took him out for a drive to enjoy the beautiful weather and scenery. While Michael, Vanessa and I enjoyed the ride and the views, Noah spent most of the time asleep in his car seat. It was nice to see him resting so peacefully... while it lasted.

Noah goes in for his two month check up -- and first round of shots :( -- on October 29th.

More updates to come...

Our Rapidly Growing Little Guy

2009-10-08T08:50:00.000-07:00

Noah is now only a little more than 6 weeks old and he is almost 12 pounds! Our little guy has been growing more and more every day. By now he has big slate blue eyes, which seem to grow wider and more amazed with each passing day. I am also happy to report that in addition to his daddy's lips, he also has his daddy’s long eyelashes. His eyebrows are also starting to come in!

This week, Noah began noticing things that he didn't seem to in previous weeks. For the first time, he noticed the mobile on his little lamb swing and it was very comical to watch his reaction. I had suspected that he would notice it and was armed and ready with my iPhone. I was fortunate enough to catch his first response to it on video (below)!:

In addition to noticing new things, Noah is learning more and more about his hands. Not only has he mastered taking his pacifier out of his mouth, but a few days ago, he took it out of his mouth and threw it! He also grabs onto the strap of his changing table when he is unhappy to be getting changed and holds on to it for dear life until I am done changing him. Lord knows how much of my hair he has pulled out or how many times he has nearly ripped my necklace off over the last few days. He’s quite a little character just as we all suspected he would be. Noah still sleeps with his hands and arms in an array of funny positions. When I wake up in the morning, I never know what I am going to find!

Aside from beginning to find his hands, Noah has also been finding his voice. He sounds a little like a magwa (baby gremblin). Listen for yourself below. (On a technical note: You can shut the music on the page off by scrolling up and clicking pause in the side bar on the right hand side of this page.)

Aside from becoming cuter and cuter, Noah has not been doing so great these past couple of weeks. His persistent tummy troubles have made him very uncomfortable and he is now on medicine that doesn’t seem to be helping much aside from making him smell like a toasted marshmallow, which is very nice. He has been on another feeding frenzy which I suspect can be attributed to his recent growth spurt. The nights have been very long indeed for the both of us… and we've been trying our best to make the days as fun and happy as possible for him.

Please keep our little guy in prayer!

One Month Old Today!

2009-09-25T09:36:00.001-07:00

I can hardly believe that Noah has been with us a month. Sometimes time seems to fly and other times, I feel like I cannot remember life before him. I'm starting to understand what my good friend Sherry means when she says "the nights are long, but the years are short." I hope they won't be. Either way, I know I'll treasure every single moment... even those where the crying is incessant or I'm so tired I can barely stay awake to feed him...

It has certainly been an eventful first month for baby Noah. The last few weeks were especially hectic for him. Suffice it to say that he has been to the pediatrician at least once a week every week since he was born, and yesterday he had to go for an ultrasound to rule out pyloric stenosis, a disorder which would have made surgery necessary had he tested positive. Fortunately, he didn't, but he continues to struggle with his tummy, which seems to be bothering him quite a bit. Poor little guy. I'm hopeful that by adopting a strict diet, I can help him feel better quickly. He has been crying a lot lately for no apparent reason and it's just been so hard to watch him seem so uncomfortable. At the pediatrician's office earlier this week, he cried real tears. It was heartbreaking. Fortunately, Noah is usually a very happy baby. Michael and I have certainly done the best we could do to keep him that way!

Over the past 4 weeks and 3 days my little baby has had some significant growth. It will not surprise you to learn that he is in the 75th percentile for height for his age. (Certinaly not something he got from his mommy!) Here are his weight stats:
Birth: 7lbs, 6oz
1 Week: under 7lbs
2 Weeks: 7lbs, 12 oz
3 Weeks: 8lbs, 12 oz
4 Weeks: 9lbs, 10 oz

He is a very long and skinny baby but for all his growth, he is still a little peanut!

It's amazing to watch him grow everyday. Everyday he becomes more alert, his eyes are more focused and he learns more about how to use his hands. It amazes me to think of where he'll be at in another month. I hope it doesn't fly as fast as the first...

Noah's First Bath!

2009-09-14T15:09:00.000-07:00

This weekend, my sister and her fiance came all the way from New York to see Noah and take part in one of his first milestones: his first bath! Given that my family lives so far away, it was really important to me that we "save" one of Noah's firsts for a time when they could be here. It was well worth the wait. So far, as shown in the pictures posted last week, Noah has not enjoyed being wet. He absolutely hates sponge baths and sadly, he has needed many as he now regularly pees as soon as his diaper is unfastened. (We are going through about 4 outfits a day so hopefully my reflexes improve quickly and/or I find a way to stop him from soaking himself instantly). Now that my sister has visited, I know that it's not just me that Noah does this to, as he did this every time Christine changed him as well. So far, Noah has been very kind to his daddy and has not yet put his reflexes (or patience!) to the test as he has mine!

Aside from the fact that I wanted my family to share in one of Noah's milestones, I also had another motivation. My sister, Christine, is a pediatric nurse, and so, I just assumed that she would know more about how to bathe a baby than I would. Long story short: it took four of us (Michael, Christine, Anthony and me) to give Noah a bath and not one of us knew what exactly we were doing or supposed to be doing! Areas where we struggled: getting the water the right temperature, getting the excess water out of the tub, figuring out how much water belonged in the tub, holding him up in the tub, using the right amount of soap, keeping the soap from getting where it did not belong, rinsing him off... need I continue?

To begin with, the four of us crowded into Noah's bathroom and ran the hot water in the sinks and tub to steam up the room. Then we had to figure out where to change and undress him. A towel on the floor over Noah's rug seemed to be the only logical place. Noah, of course, did not appreciate being undressed. It's one of his least favorite things in life. Anthony had been saying up until that point that he had not yet seen Noah cry (or turn himself into a "killer tomato," as I call him when he gets truly hysterical). Within seconds of undressing him, Noah did not disappoint and showed Anthony and my sister the full extent of his lung capacity. Noah did not fully show how much like a tomato he can appear until Christine attempted to dry his ears after his bath... He was not a happy boy.

Fortunately, Noah didn't seem to notice that none of us really had a clue as to what we were doing... He slipped easily into the tub and seemed extremely relaxed. He even looked at himself in the mirror -- something Michael has been teaching him to do this past week and something that generally calms him down when he is fussy. He did not cry once during his bath and even briefly fell asleep in the warm water... If only the aftermath of bathtime (as illustrated above) had gone as smoothly, it would have been a better night for my precious little one.

Noah getting his first bath! (video)

After it was all over, we dressed Noah in one of the new outfits his Aunt Christine and Uncle Tony bought him (his puppy pants!) and I allowed Noah to nurse away his sorrows. He had a very good night sleep afterwards. It may be a while before we attempt to give him a full bath again but at least now we know he likes it -- and that we have a lot to learn! :) Next time, I will be ready!

2 Weeks Old Today

2009-09-08T13:52:00.001-07:00

"Has it really been two weeks already?!"

Today, 09/08/09 was Noah's original due date... and on this date, he is exactly 2 weeks old... which means, I had to bring him in to the pediatrician for his 2 week check-up this morning. It was a daunting task, as I am technically not supposed to be driving yet on account of my stitches, nor am I supposed to be going up and down the stairs, let alone doing so while carrying Noah in his car seat! Today, I did all of these things without too much difficulty, albeit a fair amount of pain. A mom's gotta do what a mom's gotta do! Noah was none to happy about it and cried from the moment we got into the exam room until the moment we left. Fortunately, they did not give him any shots or take any blood from his tiny feet. I was very nervous bringing him all by myself given that these were real possibilities... Just stripping him down to his diaper proved difficult as he threw an absolute fit the moment the first snap on his onesie came undone... He was not a happy boy... :(

To back up a bit, this past weekend, Michael and I did get around to doing a lot of what we planned to do. We put Noah in his swing for the first time and assembled a few other items he'll hopefully soon enjoy. He really seemed to like the swing. In fact, he is in it right now with his little slate eyes fixed on the window in front of him. As the days go by, Noah has more and more periods of being alert. Usually his mouth is in a perfect little "O" the entire time, as in the photo above.

Aside from introducing Noah to his swing, this weekend, we also introduced him to his stroller. On Sunday, Michael and I decided to take Noah for a little walk in our old neighborhood (South Riding). Though we're keeping Noah out of public places and restricting his contact with children until he reaches the 6-8 week mark, as recommended by our doctors, we figured that a little fresh air would be good for all of us. While we were on our way to South Riding, we got the call back from the pediatrician about Noah's worsening rash. (We had called on the advice of my sister, who is a pediatric nurse.) The pediatrician on call instructed us to take Noah to the Emergency Room immediately, as the rash might have been an infection. We were on our way to Fairfax's Pediatric ER when the doctor called back and asked us to send a picture to her. Once she saw it, she told us that we did not need to take him since I had an appointment scheduled for today and gave us instructions for how to care for him in the meantime. By the time we made it to South Riding, we were all so exhausted that we only walked halfway up the block and back before we headed home. My stitches, which seem to inexplicably get tighter and tighter without much notice, would not permit much more.

So today, I brought Noah in. The doctor told me that he thinks Noah's rash is the beginnings of cradle cap, but that otherwise he is doing great. He has gained some weight and now weighs in at 7lbs 12oz. He also grew a quarter of an inch. I'm very glad that he is growing but there is a small part of me that wishes I could keep him tiny forever. He is just the most precious thing I have ever seen!

All in all, the last two weeks have been very hectic. I find that I am just losing my days just trying to stay on schedule with changings and feedings and tidying up and doing Noah's laundry, which there has been an increasing abundance of since Noah recently decided that he'd pee everytime I am about to put a clean diaper on him. (I am still getting the hang of all this!) It seems that I get nothing else done apart from caring for him, but hopefully it will get easier and soon I can start working on my school projects... Time seems to be flying, while at the same time the nights seem to drag on forever, as I try to get in what little sleep Noah will allow me to get. "It really does get easier." That is what I'm told. I really hope so... In the meantime, I just focus on what a little blessing our baby is and that sustains me... I love him so much!

A Quick Update

2009-09-05T15:04:00.000-07:00

Serves me right for posting a blog a few days ago about what a good schedule we had Noah on! That very night, after having written that entry, Noah decided to spend the whole night crying and demanding to be fed every hour and a half. That has continued ever since. I suppose it might take a while to have a schedule that sticks... We are surely being taught patience.

Aside from Noah's nighttime irritability, we had a good scare a few nights ago when one of my OBs insisted that I go to the Emergency Room for what she thought was an infection in my incision... as well a case of early mastitis that has been extremely painful. Fortunately, the doctor was wrong about the incision and it seems that the underlying problem is a build-up of scar tissue from where the catheter was inserted into my incision for pain control while I was hospitalized. That is a relief but it gave us quite a scare, especially because an infection would have meant that I'd have to have my incision reopened... something that would not have been fun. Fortunately, my family was in town and they were able to watch Noah while M and I spent the night in the ER. Poor Michael had worked all day long and then sat with me all night long before we came home to Noah who had no interest in sleeping for the few precious hours M had left before his next day of work. It didn't help that we had to drive all over Northern Virginia looking for a 24-hour pharmacy to fill my prescription either... or that M had to fix a flat tire after 3:00AM so that my family could make the drive to New York the next morning. Needless to say it has been a rough few days. Rest has become a fond memory for me though we do get bits and bursts of sleep while we can.

For all his nighttime shenanigans, Noah could not be a more wonderful baby. He is just such a little joy, I can't get mad, though it's certainly hard to keep frustration from creeping in during those late hours. When he grins in his sleep and makes his sweet cooing noises, I just feel nothing but blessed, even at 4:30 in the morning when I have finally fallen alseep and he has lost his pacifier for the 99th time!

Michael finally has a couple of days off from work and I am really looking forward to us having some time to spend together as a family -- not sleeping! Truth be told, these last few days, M and I have spent nearly all of our time together trying to get in quick naps while Noah is asleep. This weekend, aside from getting in some rest, we will hopefully be able to put Noah in his swing and bouncy seat for the first time as well as finish up the nursery. I am so looking forward to it and can't wait to post pictures!

As for the sleep positioner, Noah is still finding a way to turn himself during the night -- but fortunatley, not onto his belly, which is what we are trying to prevent. Today when I removed his blanket, this is what I found. He is a strong little boy. He has also, on multiple occaisions, kicked his way entirely out of the sleep positioner. I'm going to have to get creative to figure out a way to stop him from doing that again.

Well... just thought I'd post a quick update and a few new photos. This one is by far my favorite! What a little doll, our baby boy is! I just can't get over it...

One Week Old Today!

2009-09-01T16:07:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I put Noah down for a nap between feedings. As instructed by the doctors, I put him, as I always do, on his back. After a few minutes, I heard him make a very adorable sound in the bassinet. I looked upon him and this is what I found. Small as he is, our little guy is very strong! Needless to say, Noah now sleeps with the sleep positioner his Aunt Christine bought him. Let's see him try to wiggle his way out of that one. (I'd rather not see that actually!)

Today, Noah is officially one week old! This week has seemed like one of the longest of my life and it's been so wonderful. Noah seems to get cuter by the day and all his puffiness and redness from birth are all but gone. His newborn rash may still need a little time but it's not a big deal. He is now on a great schedule and doesn't cry to be fed or changed because it's all being taken care of before he has a chance to. (A two-hour feeding schedule, I must say, is ROUGH, but it's working out so well for our baby!) I still cannot stop staring at his little face. I am so in awe of how perfect and beautiful he is. I took this little video of him just being himself today and couldn't wait to post it. I'm just fascinated with what Michael and I have made by God's Grace :)

I know everyone says this but I really do have the most wonderful husband a new mom could ask for. I cannot express what a help Michael has been to me during this last week when so much in our life together has changed. He has been such a trooper about staying up with me all night long to feed and change Noah and help me to have everything I need to deal with the pain as I recover from my Cesarean. He has functioned in this last week on little to no sleep at all and has still had so much energy to hold and comfort Noah for hours every night.

On Saturday, Michael was injured at work, when he caught his hand in the running part of an engine, and spent the last half of the day in Urgent Care where he got stitches and a splint. When he got home, instead of taking a nap as I wished he would have, he offered to go to the Outlets with Vanessa to get some nursing apparel to help make this week easier for me. He and Nessa were gone for many hours. When they came back they presented me with what clothes they had bought as well as a gift (a wristlet) that they had bought at the Outlets. (I've been in need of something bigger for many months). I was so moved that Michael would spend his time shopping for me to try and make me happy when he desperately needed some rest for himself. A little while after I was done looking through what they'd bought, I noticed that Vanessa kept looking at the bassinet. I told her that she could pick up the baby if she wanted to. Michael said, "Why don't you hand him to her?" So I got up to get Noah. I pulled back the blanket and this is what I found.

In the box was a beautiful silver bracelet with a charm on it that says "Mom." Michael plans to get it engraved with Noah's name and birthdate and Vanessa plans to get me a charm with her name and birthday on it next time there is a holiday. Aside from going to the Outlets after his harrowing day, Michael had trekked all the way to Tyson's Corner to buy me this "push gift." I am an incredibly lucky girl. He had been working extra hard in the weeks before Noah's birth to save up and has not stopped working hard since in spite of the long hours he's stayed up with me and the baby. To top it all, Michael started his third semester of college on Monday. He'll now be in class one day and two nights a week in addition to working a full-time job. I was very sad yesterday waiting for him to come home, but fortunately his class let out early and he got home in time to eat the beautiful dinner our friend Kate had prepared for us. Tonight, he will not be getting home from work until after 8:00pm. I miss him terribly. :(

Fortunately, my family is visiting from New York and have been keeping me company. I have tried to get in as much sleep today as I possibly could so that I can try to stay up alone tonight and let Michael get the rest he'll need to get him through a full day of work and a night of classes tomorrow. I hope that will work.

Noah has had fun with his great grandma Nancy. Here is a picture of him making O's with his mouth -- one of his signature facial expressions that I just love! It has been so wonderful watching Noah getting to know her.

Anyway I will end this entry here as it's dragged on pretty long. Everyone warned me the first week would be the hardest. Admittedly, it has been trying. But I would not have traded a single moment of it -- not even when Noah peed at me last night because I wasn't keeping a proper lookout! (Fortunately he missed.) Yes girls, you did warn me!!

We are so blessed.

First Family Weekend in Review

2009-08-30T14:49:00.000-07:00

Noah had a wonderful first weekend at home with mommy, daddy, grandma, grandpa and especially, his big sister Nessa.
Vanessa was so thrilled to get to know her little brother. This weekend, she learned how to hold and handle our little guy properly, as well as change his diapers. This will surely come in handy in the future! Noah was very happy to spend time with Vanessa too. Who says babies don't smile? :)

This weekend, Noah also got to meet his great grandparents for the very first time. I "woke up" early this morning after another all night feeding frenzy and put Noah in his first real outfit. Until today, Noah's wardrobe has consisted only of onesies. Last night, however, I did put Noah in his first nightgown, which unlike the onesies, go over his head rather than snap closed. I was having trouble dressing him and Michael offered to help. After he was done pulling down the gown over Noah's feet, he looked at me and said "Did you just put my boy in a dress?!?!" I said, "No, you did," and then explained that a gown is NOT a dress! Michael was unconvinced. In any case, Noah looked very cute for his first visit downstairs and Ruth and Gene seemed to enjoy spending time with him.

Today, we were also fortunate to get a visit from our good friend Erich, who was good enough to bring us dinner tonight that can only be classified as a feast. He was very impressed with our little addition and had a good time holding him. Vanessa instructed him on exactly what he needed to do!

We have been very blessed to have so many friends who have offered to help us out during these first few hectic days. The transition has certainly been very difficult but it has all been wonderful.

It seems that Noah gets more adorable and changes so much with every passing day. His hair gets blonder by the day, and everyday he seems to open his eyes more and recognize our voices. He also seems to be adapting to life here with us. This morning was the first time I changed his diaper where he didn't cry hysterically -- and it was a VERY bad diaper to change -- because I sang him a silly song the whole time.

Although today is only Noah's 5th day with us, it marked another milestone. Today, Noah got his belly button!! He also seems to have figured out how to hold his pacifier in his mouth all on his own -- though this is something he is obviously still working on!

Tonight we will hopefully be giving Noah his first sponge bath. More posts to come soon!

UPDATE 09/01/09

The spongebath went...well... Noah was none too happy about it but he slept well afterwards!

I also have to post this picture that Michael took with his phone because it is way too precious not to be posted on the blog. This picture was taken right before Michael carried Noah into the house for the very first time.

What a beautiful family God has given to us.

Noah's First Trip to the Doctor

2009-08-29T17:03:00.000-07:00

After getting in so late last night and getting only a few winks of sleep, Michael and I decided that I should try to get my appointment for Noah rescheduled to a time when we could go together, as he had to work. I called as early as I could and was talked into coming in, so I literally had five minutes to get both of us ready to go. My mother in law said she would drive us, as I am not permitted to drive for the next two weeks. And so together, we got Noah loaded up into his car seat, which was no easy task -- especially given the fact that Noah was incredibly hungry and not at all in the mood to deal with my inability to work a four-point harness.

Oh, how I wished I had made the time to read the instruction manual! (I had to call both Michael and Chrissy at two separate points today to figure out how to get him in and out!) While my mother-in-law worked on figuring out the set up, I fed Noah for a few minutes and then we got him situated. Given the time limits, Noah's outfit was far from color coordinated for his first appointment since the hospital! Fortunately, my quick feeding did help Noah to fall asleep and he was very calm for his visit. Fortunately, this was not one of those visits where baby gets poked or prodded very much and gets all worked up. I was very glad.

He did, however, react very unfavorably to being undressed and weighed and he dirtied his diaper in response.

So, here are the "stats" on our little guy:

- Noah now weighs 7lbs, 3oz., which is a big relief given that he dropped to below 7lbs. in his first days of life. Our all night "feeding frenzy" and scheduled feedings over the last two days seems to have done the trick! The doctor recommended that I continue breastfeeding and said that there was no reason at all for me to supplement with (evil) formula. lol - sorry I really am very into this whole breastfeeding/bonding thing and the thought of having to use that stuff ever again makes me a little crazy :) Who ever would have guessed?

- Noah is a little jaundiced and the doctor told me it was nothing to worry about and that I should put him by a window inside and let him be in the sun for a little bit if the weather improved today, which I did as soon as we got home.

- In all other ways, Noah is as perfect as he looks and so far I haven't done anything too terribly wrong as far as she could tell. (I just assumed that last one. :) She did tell me to keep up the good work!

I shall surely try!

Bringing Baby Home

2009-08-29T15:07:00.001-07:00

After a very grueling few days, Noah and I were cleared to be discharged from the hospital yesterday. I was not feeling anywhere near ready physically to leave, but we were so excited about the idea of bringing Noah home, that I pushed as hard as I could to get mobile enough to leave. Michael and I were both by this time very sleep-deprived (not that we aren't now!) so it was a pretty exhausting day trying to get everything done that we needed to do before we could "check out."

Before we left, Michael and I had Noah's first pictures taken and they came out BEAUTIFUL! To view them, click: here. Noah was very cooperative and we were able to get a couple of shots where his eyes were open, as well as a very great shot of the three of us together than I cannot wait to post here soon!

After picture time was over, we then loaded Noah up into his car seat for the very first time and headed out to Warrenton to pick up his big sister, Vanessa, who was extremely excited to see her baby brother again. Although we were in a hurry to get there, Michael and I stopped along the way to attach the "baby in sight" mirror to the back seat. (Fortunately, there was hardly any traffic and we arrived early for pickup). The mirror allowed both of us to watch Noah as he slept in his car seat through the rear view mirrors. Vanessa also enjoyed watching Noah as she sat by his side for the rest of the car ride home. It was so great being to go home as a family.

As we drove home, we marveled at this being the very first time Noah would be outside, his first ride in the car, the first time he would ever see the sky or feel sunlight. How exciting for our baby boy to see the world for the first time (when his eyes were actually open)!

We did not get home until pretty late, but were so relieved when we did. It was so nice to be back in our own bed again, but I must say that my recent unwillingness to even try and sleep, which I persisted in, in the hospital for the last two days and until almost 3 in the morning yesterday, soon turned into a desire to get much more than I am going to be able to. Last night's sleep was the kind of sleep that the more I got, the more tired I felt. Poor Michael, after having such an exhausting week that he fell asleep in the Starbucks drive-through the other morning, has barely gotten any sleep at all given that he has had to work all day and help me with Noah all night, since I've been unable to lift Noah on my own before or after feedings once I am in bed. He has also been such a trooper by doing all of the night-time feedings ever since Noah was born. I must say that having a baby has certainly strengthened our marriage in so many ways.

It's amazing how fast the bonding happens and how quickly our little family has come together and adapted to this new little life. It's so amazing to look at my little guy and see how much he looks like his dad. This picture cracks me up because I think Noah looks so much like Michael here that it's scary!

So far we have agreed that Noah has Michael's forehead and temples, cheecks, lips and mouth and my hair and ears. His nose is pretty identical to how both Michael's and mine looked when we were kids and is very similar to Vanessa's. It will be so exciting to discover all the ways in which Noah resembles us more and more while he becomes himself more and more as he gets bigger. Right now, even though he looks big in most of these photographs, Noah is a little peanut. He is so tiny! And he is such a character, with a wealth of adorable expressions. He makes the sweetest little sounds. What a huge blessing our little boy is! It is so good to have him home!

The First Few Days

2009-08-27T11:53:00.000-07:00

"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb... I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." (Excerpts from Psalm 139).

Day 3

I cannot believe it has only been 3 days. I am so accustomed to life with my baby that it seems like we've spent a lifetime together. It hasn't been an easy three days but they have been amazing nonetheless.

Noah is such a good baby. I feel very blessed to be able to say that. Although most of you know that my experience with babies is minimal at best (I have more experience putting diapers on stuffed animals, even 3 days in), I think you'll all agree. He does not fuss and never cries unless he has gone to the bathroom, is having his diaper changed, is being undressed, or is hungry. That's pretty good, I'd say, as we always know how to investigate what is going on and can determine what is wrong by the simple process of elimination.

Seeing Noah face to face and being able to observe him in the world has been incredible. I have solved many mysteries as to what I was feeling in my belly while I was pregnant. How many times did I feel as though I was being punched and kicked on both sides of my belly at the same time? Well apparently it was Noah "frogging out" in his favorite position that looks a little like he is flexing his muscles with his arms and laying in a yoga pose with his legs. When unswaddled (or when he escapes) Noah loves to lay just like this... I also confirmed that he WAS hiccuping for 5 minutes at a time! He did that on his second day. On the third day, Michael found out for himself what I was talking about and we had a good laugh. It's been so comical and so exciting to discover so much about our little boy.

What I've also learned is that Noah is a sweet little boy with a ravenous appetite, which has made breastfeeding a little challenging but no less amazing. There is a reason I call him my my little alligator. :) I always told my girlfriends they were crazy when they ranted and raved about what a bonding experience it is, so I have to say I have been shocked at how right they all were and are (no offense...and sorry!). It's a surreal experience to look down at his little face knowing I carried him for nine months and that I am helping him grow big and strong even now when he is here with us. It is the sweetest thing to have him holding on to both my hands with both of his and squeezing his little hands to hold mine harder and harder while he eats. I have been blessed to get the hang of this as much as I have, while I'm laid up for the most part. The recovery has been difficult, but I'm hanging in there. Michael has been great but sadly today he had to go to work. :( It's been sad without him here and a little scary on my own. Fortunately I have lots and lots of help from the nursing staff which have been very helpful and accommodating. Soon, there will be no red button to push and no nursery to send Noah to for care when I need to get cared for myself... or sleep! I am looking forward to the challenge. I can't wait to bring my little guy home! Sleep is overrated anyway!

Anyway I just wanted to give a little update about our little addition. (I'm a corndog, I know). I'll be posting some more pictures soon. Now that Noah is here I won't be sending updates/notifcations unless you email me and ask me to... so let me know :) Otherwise, feel free to stop in from time to time and see how our little one is growing! I hope time does not keep flying... I want to enjoy every moment.

True to what I've been told time and time on end, the last few days have had me experiencing every emotion you can imagine: love, joy, fear, sadness, anxiety, you name it. But most of all, today, I feel blessed.

Nan<3

Welcome Baby Noah!

2009-08-25T18:21:00.000-07:00

Introducing
Noah Thomas Lunsford
Born: August 25, 2009
1:17AM
20.5 inches
7 lbs, 6 oz.

Slightly before one o'clock this morning, I was told to say goodbye to Michael and enter the operating room. I really wish I could have done so blindfolded as it looked more like a chamber of torture than a hospital room. I was laid upon the table for what seemed like an eternity as I was strapped down, undressed, catheterized and drawn upon. My body was shaking the whole time from either the cold or my nerves or both. Dr. C told me that the same thing happened to her, but this was not reassuring. I never felt so scared in my whole life as I did laying there. I kept praying as hard as I could for God to give me peace about the surgery but as I was doing so, the anesthesiologists and nurses were moving at rapid fire pace without explaining anything to me. Out of nowhere a mask was brought down on my face and I suddenly could not breathe. Because I was strapped down everywhere all I could do was jerk my face out from under it to indicate that I could not breathe. The anesthesiologist told me that I would fall asleep soon but I could not help but fight to get away from the mask that was making it impossible for me to take a breath. Eventually (obviously) I fell asleep.

I woke up in the recovery room to see Michael feeding Noah a bottle. I could not really see much as my eyes were blurry from the medicine but I was so relieved that Noah was OK. It wasn't until later in the day that I was able to see just how beautiful my little boy really is. When Michael finally handed him to me he kept opening his mouth and sticking out his tongue. It was too precious.

My family arrived shortly before noon. It was such a great moment to see everyone together and to watch everyone's reaction to meeting Noah. It still feels a little surreal to me.

Seeing Vanessa's reaction to meeting her little brother for the first time was priceless. She could not have been more thrilled. Noah bears a striking resemblence to her in so many ways -- he is Michael's "mini me" for sure. As far as looking anything like me, I disagree with my sisters who both think he looks like me but I must admit... he certainly was born with my hair!

At about a quarter to 7:00PM, Michael left to take Vanessa back to her mom. My family had gone a few minutes prior. So here I was, all alone with a newborn! Of course, what seemed to come so easy to me when I had so many people to help became the most challenging and difficult task. Fortunately the nurses were able to help me but only after I practically knocked down everything on the table near my bed to reach the phone and call them. Noah would not stop crying and I took as many deep breaths as I could and tried to stay calm. I was SO relieved when Michael returned!

This has definitely been the LONGEST day of my life and one which gave me the hugest blessing. Noah is asleep in his little plastic bassinet besides me and I'm wondering what it will be like to wake every 2 hours to feed him tonight. I am up for the challenge but for now it's time to sleep...

I cannot believe how much love I feel for something SO small. God is so great and we are SO blessed! (And for now...and surely for MANY days and nights to come... exhausted!)

Goodnight and thank you all for your prayers, your love and support.

Michael, Nancy, Vanessa & Noah Lunsford

A surprise ending?

2009-08-24T19:29:00.000-07:00

I am writing this on my iPhone from Labor & Delivery at Fairfax Hospital. It looks like date night will have to wait. It appears that I'm in labor. I am contracting every two minutes. At 5pm I started having bad pains and realized that in all my rushing around today and fussing with laundry I hadn't felt Noah move. So I ate some teddy grahams and drank some juice and laid down. Since that time I have been having bad contractions. Noah started moving shortly after so I did not go to the hospital. But once they got worse I had no choice. So here I am. Waiting. Feeling really nervous. I thought I had more time but I guess nothing prepares you for this, huh? After two botched IVs and contractions that have made me see stars I am accepting that it's now or never. We are still waiting on the platelet count so they can decide whether to transfuse me. Because I ate the Teddy grahams I have to wait until 1:00am for the cesarean. So it looks like Noah will be born on august 25th unless things start moving faster. My water still hasn't broken for whatever that is worth. Dr. C will be delivering Noah. For now we wait...

My family just called to tell me they going to be on their way from New York in a few hours. I still can't believe this is happening or that I'm just hours away from meeting my baby. I'm so nervous. Please keep us in prayer. Will update this entry if more news.

Nan<3

The Final Countdown!!!!

2009-08-24T07:15:00.001-07:00

We now have TEN days until Noah will be born! It’s a little difficult to grasp. When I think of how time has flown and all the mini-countdowns we’ve already been through, it makes my head spin! Wasn’t it just yesterday that we were counting down to making it past the 12 week mark? Or to the third trimester? Or to the next ultrasound? The last was 18 weeks ago! Sometimes it's so hard to believe it is really happening.

I was going through my “belly book” the other night. (It's a book that charts the growth of my belly and baby in pictures and documents all of my prenatal appointments and milestones). And I couldn’t believe that when we first saw our son’s precious little face he was only 4.5 inches long!

Now he is possibly more than 20! Seeing how tall his dad is, that would not surprise me – or anyone!

These last few days I have been in crazy “nesting” mode, having huge bursts of energy during the day that send me cleaning, organizing and doing everything I can until my feet are so swollen I can no longer stand! Yesterday, I detailed the inside of my car with a dust-buster and microfiber cloths for a good 2 hours. I felt like a nut but all I kept thinking is that our precious baby will be riding in that car in a matter of DAYS and I wanted it to be as dust free as possible! Today I am set on folding and washing every remaining article of clothing and anything else that needs washing (car seat, swing, etc.) before I drop. It should be a fun day! If nothing else, it will certainly help me to get some much needed sleep tonight!

Tomorrow marks another milestone: Our last OB appointment! Our last chance to get any questions we might have answered. A big question on my mind concerns a conversation I had with Dr. B last week that I have not blogged on. Apparently, my platelet count seems to be in free fall for some reason. By the last hand count my platelets are at 64,000 which means that over a 4-day period they somehow decreased by 20,000. That is a little disconcerting and I’m hoping that there is either some mistake or that they will jump up a bit before delivery. The hematologist who I saw 4 days before that very last blood test was taken told me the only real “danger” is that the count drops into the 30,000’s -- but if they are decreasing as fast as the latest test suggests, that might not be so far fetched. Please keep that in prayer... We are still hoping that come delivery-time, a transfusion won't be necessary...

In the meantime, Noah is growing very uncomfortable in his close quarters. His kicks are very intense and he seems to be dragging limbs back and forth in frustration. (It really does look sometimes as though he is planning his escape!) I find myself gently rubbing his protruding feet out of my rib cage several times a day and all through the night. He has also now managed to get his hands down in my hip sockets which is a VERY unpleasant feeling. He is exploring... And yes, he is still content to kick just about anything that comes into contact with my massive belly. Washing the dishes at this time in life is NOT fun. But, oh, what a character my little boy is! I cannot wait to meet him!

In the meantime, I am treasuring my last remaining days with my husband, when it is still just the two of us for the most part. And I’m looking forward to one last “date night” before we have a new little life to take care of... God only knows how much our lives are about to change...

How time flies… More tomorrow…

The Final Stretch

2009-08-18T12:48:00.000-07:00

We now have exactly 16 days until Noah's arrival... or less! Today, my OB confirmed that I am 1 cm dialated, which -- as she put it -- is not earth shattering, but it shows that things are starting to progress! She said it was unlikely that Noah would come today or tomorrow but that he could really come any day now. I am still holding out hope that "any day" will be a Thursday, but we shall see what God has in store. Today marked the day that Noah became full-term so at least we have no more worries about "going early!"

Today's OB visit was mildly uneventful aside from learning this news. I did finally sit down and chart out a birth plan so that no matter who is on call when the time comes, that person will know all the details. Comforting... Next on the agenda: Packing the hospital bag! This morning I did a large load of Noah's laundry. I just sat there going through all those tiny tiny clothes and imagined what it would be like when he arrives. My head is spinning!

Other than that, these last couple of weeks have been trying to say the least. My feet have been so swollen that I can barely get my shoes on (some days not at all). My flip-flops won't even fit. Dr. C calls this "pregnancy Shrek feet" and for those who have seen the movie, I can say, it is a very accurate description. It's awful -- but it will be over soon, right? Dr. C just had a baby herself (8 weeks ago) and told me that after her Cesarean her foot swelling actually got worse for a couple of weeks but then cleared up. I'm hoping that won't be the case with me! We shall see.

The countdown continues...

Update from Hematology Appointment

2009-08-14T05:06:00.000-07:00

So, yesterday I went to the hematologist where I had my platelet count done by hand. Fortunately, that count was in the low 80's, as we hoped and expected it would be. The doctor discussed different options with me and told me that she likes Dr. Silas' plan to give me a transfusion before the Cesarean and so she will not put me on steroids this late in the game. I thank God for that! I will have to come back in if the count goes back down into the 60's, but I'm hoping that, that won't happen. I will also have to go back in for more testing a month after I give birth to make sure that this was caused by the pregnancy and that it's not something that is going to be problematic in the future...

In the meantime, I have been getting a lot of quality time with my good friends, which has certainly helped me through what has been a trying time. Cardmaking with Kate, scrapbooking with Sherry, cookie baking with Carin (just to name a few examples from the last week!) -- it's all been a huge blessing to me and reminded me of just how lucky I am to be surrounded by so many caring people!

I am also blessed to have such a wonderful husband. Michael and I had a wonderful 3rd wedding anniversary on the 11th when he took me to my first drive-in movie, where I (in true pregnant fashion) fell asleep before the movie ended! I have a feeling it will not be the last time that happens as we approach parenthood!

We now have 20 days until my Cesarean! Less than 3 weeks! Time has flown so fast. And what a ride it has been...

Update from OB appointment

2009-08-12T07:34:00.000-07:00

So yesterday I finally saw Dr. Silas and he addressed a number of my concerns, including the issues with my platelets. He basically told me that the new plan is that if i make it to September 3rd, I will need to be at the hospital by 7am where I'll get all kinds of blood testing and then a transfusion of platelets if my count is anything below 100,000. Once they reach that threshold, then I will be ready to go under general anesthesia. Alternatively, if I go into labor on a different date, then I will receive platelets until the count is above 80,000 before I will go into surgery. If I make it to the 3rd, I will be at the hospital for at least 5 hours before the surgery so now I can prepare myself for a long day...

I go to the hematology and oncology specialist on Thursday where they will run all kinds of test to determine whether the cause of my declining platelet count is an autoimmune disorder, that my platelets are just not being replaced by my body as fast as they are being consumed or that my body is actually destroying them. Dr. Silas mentioned something about a bone marrow test, which I sincerely hope will not be necessary. There is still also a strong possibility that I'll be started on steroids which I am also hoping against. So... I will know more tomorrow and will likely be posting an update when all that is said and done.

Other than that, I am happy to report that Noah is now head down so he seems to be ready... 3 more weeks!

Another Milestone.... and some more bad news....

2009-08-11T04:31:00.000-07:00

Three years ago today, Michael and I eloped on a beach in the Turks & Caicos islands before God and no guests...

A year later, we were married in our church wedding in front of our closest family and friends...

The year after that, we were on our way out of the city and into the suburbs...

And today, after three years of marriage we are just weeks (or days) away from bringing a new life into the world and adding a little addition to our family!

A lot can happen in just a few years and I feel very blessed for where God has taken me and what he has taken me through. This year has been a rough one, but I do believe that God has used it as a growing experience for me, Michael and our marriage. Lately, in these last months of pregnancy, I feel like our patience and faith have been put to the test and I'd like to think that we are holding up to the test on both counts, only through God's Grace...

Yesterday, I got a very upsetting call from my OB (Dr. D). She called to tell me that my platelet count is "dangerously low" and that we are now looking at a count in the 60,000's. The normal range is 250,000-150,000 and I've been warned throughout the pregnancy if they got down to a certain number they would have to intervene and put me on steroids. She told me that I am now beyond the point of an epidural (which we had already ruled out with Dr. Silas, who I still hope will deliver Noah) so I asked her whether it would be necessary for me to go on steroids given that I am already having the baby under general anesthesia. I was not prepared for her response. "Do you want to wake up and see your baby?" she asked me. She then proceeded to tell me that there was a risk I could bleed to death and that at this point she is afraid that my platelets might be "nonfunctional." This was obviously not what I wanted to hear...

So, I am leaving here in a few minutes to go to the OB where I am seeing Dr. Silas who will hopefully give me a more positive outlook and then later this week I will be going back to the hematologist to figure out a plan for getting my platelets stabilized before delivery. At this point, Noah can arrive at any minute so the sooner we get the count up, the better, I suppose, though I do not look forward to having to take steroids by any stretch of the imagination. At this point, I'll do whatever I have to do in the hopes that it makes things go as smoothly as possible on Noah's birth-day. Ultimately, I remind myself that God is in control... and that is a great Truth to rest on these days (and everyday!).

And in the meantime, I will try my best to make this a very Happy Anniversary for me and Michael, as we can only imagine all that another year will bring and where we will be a year from today...

10...9...8...7...6...5...4....

2009-08-07T10:31:00.001-07:00

We now have less than 4 weeks until Baby Noah arrives! 3 weeks and 6 days to be exact -- unless our little one decides he's had enough "baking" and makes an early appearance, which I am feeling certain he will. He really seems to want out these days and he has gotten noticeably bigger. His kicks have become quite painful and I won't even mention what it feels like when he tries to roll! Everyone I talk to who has seen me in person agrees that he will run out of room soon, but somehow my belly seems willing and able to keep accommodating him! I still am in awe of it most days!

The preterm contractions have continued, sad to say, and the doctor is fairly certain it is stress-related. I should have gone back to the hospital on Sunday night but forced myself to try and sleep through them -- something I probably won't get away with much more as we are now so close to our delivery date. I have been under a great deal of stress these past few weeks and I'm hoping that life will calm down a little before I REALLY learn what stress is, having my first interaction with a newborn that does not belong to someone else. I was hoping that M and i would be able to take a newborn care class but unfortunately they all filled up and we can't fill the one slot remaining in the only class left. I did have a good time learning how to change a diaper on a stuffed bunny at my friend Kate's house a couple of weeks ago so hopefully what I learned from doing that will stick! Not much experience, but better than none!

3 weeks and 6 days is likely to fly and there is still so much Michael and I need to do to get ready for Noah's arrival (besides learning how to change diapers on stuffed animals lol). I have been slowed down quite a bit now that I'm so far along (and so big!) but hopefully we will both find time and energy to get as prepared as we possibly can!

A little bit at a time...

Another Unexpected Trip to L&D

2009-07-31T07:12:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, Michael and I spent 8 hours in the labor & delivery unit at Fairfax Hospital. I guess we got a free trial run out of what was a very difficult day for the both of us.

I had been trying to get in touch with my OB for 2 days to discuss the fact that I have been sick for the past week or so and get some advice. When the OB called yesterday morning I happened to mention what I thought was a harmless occurrence. Before I could even finish my sentence, my OB insisted that I go immediately to Fairfax Hospital to be monitored. I was very unhappy (mad) about it, but it ended up being a good thing that I went. It turned out that by the time we got to the L&D, I was having contractions that were 2 minutes apart. Though the monitor usually read between 20-65, I was having contractions that registered above 100, which I didn't even know were possible. It was very painful and daunting... Fortunately my OB -- Dr. Silas (the one who will hopefully be delivering Noah on September 3rd) determined that my water had not broken - though he told me that if it had, he would have delivered Noah yesterday. The idea that we could have had a baby yesterday is still a little alarming. (There is still so much I need to do to prepare!) It was a big wake up call for both of us...

Dr. Silas also discussed with me the issue of my platelets and what the OB told me at my last appointment. The platelet count taken at the office on Monday showed that my count had gone down to 70,000. The OB who warned me about being hospitalized until it could go up (the same one who sent me to Fairfax yesterday) insisted that I make an appointment immediately with the hematologist. Fortunately, a manual count at the L&D showed that they were closer to 84,000 which is still low but not at alarming. Dr. Silas said he would not presume to speak for the anesthesiologists at the hospital and that we would cross whatever bridge when we got to it. He said that if the count went below 75,000 again I'd most likely have to go on steroids but his outlook seemed much more positive and his approach more flexible. That made me feel a lot better about the situation...

The remedy for the contractions I was having was to give me IV fluids (since it was likely dehydration from being sick that led to all this in first place) as well as to give me an IM shot of Terbutaline, which is the drug that gave me very bad side effects the last time I was having pre-term contractions. Fortunately, it did not have as bad of an effect this time. My contractions eventually slowed to every 10 minutes but the doctor on call did not think that this was sufficient. And so, I got a second injection right as Michael and I thought we were going to be permitted to go home. (I felt like a pin cushion to be honest and neither of us were thrilled about having to stay any longer in the unit than we already had.) My heart rate, needless to say to anyone who is familiar with this drug, stayed up around 120 for most of the day. I feel like I ran a marathon. Noah was true to form and spent most of the day kicking the monitor that was reading his heartbeat (which I was no less than thrilled to listen to all day). It sounded like someone was constantly hitting a microphone with full force and it gave me a lot of good laughs through all the confusion.

Once the contractions slowed down enough I was released... just in time to go get something to eat with my husband's band and all the other D.C. Serve volunteers, who were gathering to celebrate a job well done. Given that I had not eaten since the early morning and it was now almost 8:00PM, I was thrilled... even though a big part of me was longing for my own bed.

So... I hope I made that long story as short as I could. I am home in bed now on strict orders to take it easy, stay off my feet, and drink a ton of water, etc. etc. etc. still trying to come to grips with the fact that Noah could really be arriving any day now -- though in my heart of hearts, I just pray it's a Thursday so I can at least have him delievered by our doctor of choice.

4 weeks and 6 days (max) until we meet our son.

It's all in God's hands...

Nan<3

Sobering News

2009-07-27T18:42:00.000-07:00

We now have no more than 38 days until we bring Noah home! The excitement regarding that fact aside, today I went for my routine prenatal visit and sadly, got nothing but bad news (though – to look on the bright side – it could have been much worse). Apparently my platelets took another dive and the OB warned me that they would have to intervene very soon to bring the count up (via steroids) b/c the anesthesiologists at Fairfax have been refusing to administer any anesthesia to patients with platelets as low as mine. He said that if my platelets stayed this low they would have to hospitalize me and postpone my C-Section until they could get those numbers up. Not at all what I wanted to hear. I will now be going to the OB once a week to have my blood taken and will be started on steroids any day now if things do not improve quickly. I was also urged to see at least two more specialists, who are not covered under our insurance deductible... The bad news just kept coming...

To top matters off, I was also warned that I should not travel outside of Virginia for any reason from here on out. The doctor warned that I am "too close to the end of my pregnancy" and that "too much has gone wrong now that I cannot take any risks by leaving Virginia for any reason." This was not made easier for me by the fact that my grandmother (Ma) went to the hospital today (and still may be there for all I know – I am still waiting for news). Not being able to go to NY to be with her is killing me… I honestly don't know that I will be able to stay away...

Aside from all this, recently the nerves in my hips and lower back have become severely inflamed – so much so that I could barely walk the last few days. I have never experienced worse sciatica than I have these past two weeks. I was able to go to church yesterday only because I happened to still have the cane I used from after my back surgery… God did use this experience, however, as a woman at church with her own physical limitations came over to me and told me what an encouragement I was to her that I had these problems and was still carrying on as well as I am... That certainly made my day and reminded me of how far God has brought me. I must say that I never thought my spine would hold up as well as it has. It was just ironic that I had been asking God all week why this was happening to me and in that moment when I spoke to her, I really felt that there was a purpose for the pain and it made me feel SO much better...

So… pregnancy (and life in general) is not getting any easier but I am hanging in there. Just a little longer, right? In the meantime, the nursery is almost finished and I'm eager to post some pictures... Hoping to do that soon...

Nan<3

An Affair to Remember

2009-07-27T16:35:00.001-07:00

After counting down the days for weeks, my family finally arrived from New York last week to throw me a baby shower that they put so much time, love, money and energy into that I’m still in disbelief. It was a wonderful day for Noah and one I will not soon forget...

Although I knew the date, much about the shower was very much a surprise. My family (and that includes Christina, Stefanie and Jenna, who might as well share a last name with me and my sister for how they have been there for both of us) sent me out of the house and treated me to my first pedicure and manicure in over a year so they could get everything ready and perfect. When I walked in I was beyond surprised. Never could I have envisioned the view I’d see. I really have never seen such BEAUTIFUL decorations in all my life. I’m only sad that it seems that no one captured it on film ☹ Fortunately, it's firm in my memory! Of course I will update this entry should any pictures surface, though I doubt any could do it justice...

Aside from being the most beautiful shower, it may have also been the first time in the history of baby showers that the mom-to-be got nearly everything she could ever want or need for the baby! I was encouraged to over-register for weeks in order to get the 10% completion discount at Babies R’ Us after Noah is born, but never did I expect that by the end of the week, that registry would be SO near completion that there would be little left for me to purchase! What a blessing during what has been such a challenging time for M and me!

Among the special moments at my shower was seeing Vanessa in the shirt that one of my best friends, Emily, made her. The front read "Big Sis" and the back read "Little Angel" with beautiful wings. Nessa was ecstatic to sport that shirt and share in opening all her baby brother's presents -- and there were many!

Another favorite moment was when I gave Vanessa the photo book I made her ("Before We Were Four"), which documents the last four years in pictures. I so wanted her to feel special that day and I think she did. I hope that it will remind her of all the happy memories we shared when it was just the three of us. You have no idea how eager I am to make her a sequel ("Now We Are Four") -- as any other A.A. Milne devotee will understand... :)

I am so grateful to everyone who made it possible and worked so hard to give me a day I would never forget. I cannot say enough how moved I was by how many people showed up for Noah and me. I certainly feel loved…. and blessed beyond belief. This was just another great reminder of how God provides! Noah is one lucky baby to have so many people who care about him and I am so blessed to have the friends and family I do! I know that my son will not want for anything – especially not love, of which there will never be a short supply! – and that is the greatest gift of all...

Nan<3

Never a Dull Moment (10... 9... 8...)

2009-07-08T11:36:00.001-07:00

We now have less than 8 weeks to go until my Cesarean, which we are working to get scheduled on September 1 so we can keep our OB of choice. In the meantime, things have gotten... interesting...

On Monday morning, I got a call from one of my OBs telling me that the results of my blood test came back and that my platelets took another dive, making it necessary for me to see a hematologist. The OB explained that my platelet count had dropped 17,000 every 2 weeks for the last 4 weeks and that it was now below 75,000, which is the cut-off point at which the hospital will do an epidural/spinal. (A normal range, apparently is 250,000-150,000 and I had been warned in the past that if the numbers dipped below 100,000 I'd be started on steroids). He said if my platelets stayed this low, I would have no choice but to go to sleep for the Cesarean, which is somewhat reassuring in that Michael and I already made the decision to go with all the advice we've been given and deliver Noah under general anesthesia in September... at least we made the decision and aren't being "forced" into it by any means...

So today Michael and I went to the hematologist, where they did a platelet count on the spot. The test came back showing 98,000 on one look and 100,000 on another and the doctor said my platelets will need to be monitored. So, long story short, I will be going to the hematologist once a week for the remainder of my pregnancy. The doctor said they would not start steroids (thank goodness!) unless the numbers dip below 50,000, but that if my platelets remain below 100,000, I will need a transfusion when I deliver Noah. So... my schedule just got busier, it seems... I will be doing a LOT of driving to Fairfax in the not too distant future, but with less than 8 weeks to go, it will hopefully fly!

Other than that, the most recent blood work also showed that I am slightly anemic, which at least explains why I have been feeling so tired and dizzy again... I have not felt up to swimming anymore sad to say. I miss having that energy but hopefully it will come back soon.

In the meantime, M and I are house-sitting/dog-sitting in South Riding at our friend Sherry's so traveling to the doctor was certainly made a lot easier this week. I am grateful for that. Noah, of course, is very active. I am getting more and more anxious to meet him.

Won't be long now! :)

30 weeks down, 9 to go!

2009-07-01T05:07:00.001-07:00

This week has been markedly different from the weeks proceeding it – and in mostly good ways. For one, I’m out of work now (not a good thing), so I was able to enjoy the last few days spending time with my stepdaughter, who is with us until Sunday and has been since last Friday. We’ve spent a great deal of time swimming, which has been a huge blessing to me, as it is the one exercise I am amazingly able (and very well-able I might add) to do.

Believe it or not, I think pregnancy has somehow made me a better swimmer! Michael jokes that my belly acts like a fin that gives me more traction in the water LOL but I honestly feel strong – stronger than I have in a long time! (Special thanks to Sherry for getting me off the couch and into the water!) Vanessa really enjoys pool-time, especially the fact that she can “lift” me up in the pool, with me laying on my back on the surface of the water. She gets a very big kick (no pun intended) out of the fact that my belly emerges from under the water like a huge iceberg oddly shaped like her brother. Noah’s kicks and turns can clearly be seen under my black bathing suit which lays flat like a triangle on one side when my belly comes up out of the water and then shows off Noah’s round little back on the other. I have been amazed at how my belly has contorted lately, especially during our pool-time. Needless to say, I will not be posting any pictures of myself to illustrate this entry. Suffice it to say that the only way I could look more like orca or a penguin at the pool is if my bathing suit had a little bit of white on the stomach. Fortunately, my waddle only seems to appear on dry land!

To date, I have gained 21 pounds and with 9 weeks to go, I wonder how much bigger my belly could possibly get. I had an appointment with the OB yesterday who assured me that I am right on target with my weight and that I shouldn’t worry that Noah is a giant given the enormous size of my belly. He said I should think of myself as “gloriously small” and Noah as normal sized. That said, my fundal height has me measuring 1cm big and the OB estimated that Noah is approximately 3 ½ pounds now! He has certainly been packing a bigger punch these days so I suppose that I should not find that surprising.

In other news, which has been very upsetting to me, Michael and I are back at the drawing board now in terms of deciding when to have Noah and who to have deliver him if the choice does turn out to be ours to make. We had all but decided on September 2 with Dr. Silas but much to my dismay, I learned yesterday that that date does not work for him. So now we must decide whether we should change the date or the doctor. I am extremely anxious about making this decision, especially because I had total peace about it before we got the news yesterday. I am hoping that God will answer my prayers quickly, though Michael reminds me that whoever is meant to deliver Noah will – something I don’t doubt.

The countdown continues…

10 Weeks and Counting!

2009-06-24T09:27:00.001-07:00

I just looked at my "baby countdown clock" and realized that -- as of today -- Noah will be here in exactly 10 weeks (or less)! How incredibly exciting -- just had to share that. :)

Some of you might remember my post not long ago about my basketball-sized stomach. Well... according to one of my baby websites, Noah is now the size of a basketball himself, measuring approximately 16 inches and weighing in at a little over 3 pounds. That definitely explains the growing power of his kicks and punches lately -- as well as my ballooning belly. I seem to get bigger by the day... Fortunately, I am still taking it all in stride, though there are times when I really miss my waist!

It's all worth it. :)

It won't be long now!!!

Third Trimester Update - Two Down, One to Go!

2009-06-17T12:33:00.001-07:00

Well, it's official, I am now in my Third Trimester and time is flying! Hard to believe it's been a month since my little stint in L&D. We are now in the home stretch and with my Cesarean tentatively scheduled for September 2nd, we have exactly 11 weeks until we bring baby home unless Noah decides to make an early appearance, which just about everyone suspects at this point. Only God knows! My OB said that the earliest they would do the Cesarean if I were to go into labor is 35 weeks which means Noah could be here in less than 7! Either way in 11 weeks or less (God-willing) we will have a new little person in our world... how wonderful and terrifying!

The last few weeks have been incredibly hectic for Michael and me. I had the honor of being a bridesmaid in my one of my best friend's weddings. I was one of two pregnant bridesmaids and during the rehearsal, as we waddled down the aisle, I joked that it was like the march of the penguins. The wedding went beautifully and Michael and I had a great time at the rehearsal.

In the meantime, I have been hanging in there as my dear hubby has been hard at work readying the nursery, which is now half-painted and has a crib sitting in the middle of it over a tarp -- the crib that sadly still has to go back and be swapped for an undamaged one. I am so eager for the room to be ready for our little boy and can't wait to post pictures!

Yesterday I had my third trimester check up (I'll now have them every 2 weeks until August when it switches to once a week) and got my shot of RHogam, which was not fun. We met with the last of the doctors in our practice (the one who -- if we go by Michael's processs of elimination (a head-to-head match-up between the 4 doctors via coin toss) -- will be delivering Noah). Fortunately he was more conservative than the last OB and did not start me on steroids as I was told would happen should my platelet count dip any lower. Unfortunately it did take another dive but there is nothing we can do but wait and then as we get closer to delivery start them up if need be. I am really hoping that does not happen. Looks like I'll be getting blood tests every two weeks from here on out. Fun.

Other than that we are just hanging in there as best as we can... Noah is more active now than ever and I am very grateful for that. Lately my belly looks a bit like something straight out of Alien but it's always nice to be reminded that he is really growing and fast -- hard to forget that I am! All worth it! :)

Noah's Crib Has Arrived...

2009-06-09T12:27:00.000-07:00

It's a beautiful Creations Summer's Evening Sleigh Crib in cherry wood (a gift from my dad) that converts to a toddler bed and then a full size headboard and footboard. It is all put together in Noah's nursery, which is still mostly empty...and... it has to go back :(

My dad ordered Noah his crib and mattress on Memorial Day weekend and we were told that it would be 8-12 weeks until it arrived. When I got the call from the store telling me it had arrived (the weekend my family visited), I was thrilled! Last night, Michael and I finally got it home and put together (after a veryyyyy long day) only to find a few deep cracks in the wood -- one as long as 13 1/2 inches. So, it looks like we will be waiting for another crib to be ordered and we can only hope it will arrive as quickly as this one did...

Still, it is exciting to have a crib in the house. Definitely makes it all seem so much more REAL! Aside from the crib, B.O.B. has also "moved in." B.O.B. is our stroller (The B.O.B. Revolution Jogger) that I affectionately call by name, as though it is a person. I really love him! (see? haha) It is the most comfortable to push full-size stroller imaginable and packs up very easy (good for someone with a bad back!) and we got a great deal.

I am officially in my 7th month as of today. Time is flying!!

A Brief Update

2009-06-06T08:45:00.000-07:00

The second trimester is quickly winding down and some all-too-familiar issues from the first trimester have begun rearing their ugly heads' again. It's like bad de ja vu! Meanwhile, I am trying to adapt to all the changes I have undergone over the past 6 months as I learn more and more about Noah's personality and count down to his due date (less than 95 days!).

Carrying around a basketball sized stomach has not been an easy task. My respect for all the women who have done this before me grows daily. The "basketball" seems to get heavier everyday as my belly grows and stretches beyond what I think it can bear. There are times where I wish I could just take it off and set it aside for a while just so I can sleep a few hours. Sleeplessness has become unavoidable to me. Everyone says things to me like "oh you haven't seen anything yet," or "Just wait another month." This is not comforting. My husband's confession that he has never seen such a big belly on pregnant woman at this stage also does not help much.... but is always good for a laugh. I can use a lot of those these days!

Vanessa's birthday party went well in spite of my being laid up so I cannot complain. There was a lot of smiles and laughter that day all around!

My visit with my family also went very well. It was so good to be on my feet and out of the house! We were able to walk around Harper's Ferry for a short while before a torrential downpour sent us on our way home...

In spite of all the drawbacks, pregnancy certainly has its perks! Noah moves everyday and always manages to crack me up when I most need it (he and his dad share that gift). The other night I cooked dinner for my in-laws and grandparent-in-laws (a labor of love!) and slid into my seat. As soon as I sat down, relieved to take a rest, Noah began kicking the table. He continues letting me know when he wants something out of his way, which is basically anything I come in contact with, with my stomach. What a funny baby. I have also been getting past the shock of seeing Noah curled up on one side of my belly. It is the strangest thing to see it get so high and weird-shaped on one side and so flat on the other. These moments make it all worth it!

In the meantime, I have entered nesting mode in high gear, in which I am now consumed with coming up with cost-effective ideas on how to make the perfect nursery space for Noah. I thought I'd end this post by sharing a sneak preview.... I'm very excited about it so far! (I'm a dork, I know... but I just can't wait to bring my baby home.)

Updates and Some Good News

2009-05-28T07:09:00.000-07:00

So, I am writing this from my OB's waiting area where I am awaiting a second blood glucose test. Fun! I still have some pretty nasty bruises from what the phlebotomist at Loudoun did to me, so it should be interesting to figure out where they are going to get this blood from in thirty minutes. Apparently, the office did the test too early at my last routine appointment and they need to check my platelet count, as it has been low on the last two tests. From what the doctor said, there will be a lot more blood tests in my future.... and if my platelets dip any further down than what they were at my visit last week, they will have to start me on steroids. We are hoping it doesn't come to that... In the short term, I am hoping that the phlebotomist here is more competent than the one I encountered last week.

So on to the important stuff... (and the good news)... my OB disagrees with the OB from Loudoun and does not think I need to be on bed rest. Praise God! (And I do.) However, I am still on restriction from certain activities, which is not so thrilling. Nevertheless, I will be able to live life normally for the most part and that makes me happy... especially because at this moment, my family is on their way from N.Y. (lost in D.C.). Guess I will be able to go to the Carter's Outlet with them this afternoon after-all!

My OB called what happened pre-term contractions (a little different from Braxton Hicks and not pre-term labor, which is what the OB doc told me) but said that the most important thing is that my cervix was completely closed so until further notice, I can cease worrying. That is very good news indeed. She also told me that her best advice to me was that I never go to either of those hospitals again and next time get to Fairfax where one of my doctors can see me. Note taken (not that I needed to be told that!).

To end off on a funny note: When my OB put the fetal doppler on my belly today, Noah kicked her and then proceeded to run away from her all over my belly as she chased him back and forth for a few minutes. This is his new thing now. He does not want anything touching my belly. At the ER, when they had the monitor attached to my belly to chart my contractions, he kicked it repeatedly. When I go to bed at night and finally get comfortable, he begins kicking the side of my belly that is touching the bed. And today, on the way over, he was kicking my seatbelt. I find it really comical that my nutty baby doesn't just move to the other side, but rather, tries to get rid of whatever is inconveniencing him at the moment. So funny how I am already learning so much about him...

Thanks so much for all your prayers.

Nan<3

Our Worst Week Yet

2009-05-23T05:24:00.000-07:00

This week – week 25 - has by far been the most difficult and trying of my pregnancy. If not for the fact that I committed to keeping this blog up-to-date, I would just as soon forget all of it and not even put it into words. Nevertheless, this will at least prevent me from having to speak about it any more than I already have had to, which has already been too much in my opinion.

I’ve been in a funk for a week or so now with my back-pain increasing daily as my belly grows and the migraines starting up again. Early this week, I decided I would try to stop being such a recluse and go outside on the bedroom balcony to stretch and get some fresh air early in the morning after Michael had already left for work. Little did I know that when I closed the door behind me to keep the bugs out, the door would lock in the frame behind me.

To make a long story short, after an hour and a half of screaming for someone to hear me, I was able to get back inside (My grandfather-in-law who walks in the woods most mornings eventually came out and heard me!). My in-laws were set to move in at noon that day and I was terrified that I would have to wait outside in the cold for hours on end wearing a thin t-shirt until they arrived, especially once the bees started buzzing around me! Fortunately, I got inside before I could get bit and live out any of the worst-case-scenarios that had been racing through my mind.

There were some moments of humor for me at least, when our outdoor cat, Stripes, stood down in the grass below and meowed up at me each time I yelled Gene’s name, wagging his tail. We “conversed” for quite a while before he ran and started meowing outside Gene’s door, which I could just barely see from where I was standing. It was like Lassie trying to rescue Timmy from the well, but he eventually gave up and went his own way after he heard noises in the woods…

The two days that followed --these last two-- were much less of a laughing matter…

On Thursday, we had a “’problem visit” with the OB due to some complications and I was given some strict instructions (regarding the number and severity of contractions I’ve been having lately), which I never thought I’d have to follow so soon… In a nut shell: I spent most of my day and night in the hospital yesterday.

After having very bad contractions all day yesterday, I was given instructions by my OB to go to Fairfax hospital at around 2pm. But no sooner than I could get out the door did the contractions start coming increasingly close together and lasting longer and longer. I knew I’d never make the hour drive to my doctor’s hospital so my mother-in-law raced me over to Cornwall, which erroneously informed us on the phone that they had a Labor & Delivery Unit. Long story short, after a very bad experience in their ER which included a nurse botching two IVs in my arm after telling me that he’d been giving them for 25 years and never misses (right after I informed him he’d never make the vein in that arm), and having to stop a nurse from injecting me with morphine of all things(!), I was transferred by ambulance to the hospital that actually has L&D. Once we got there, we played the waiting game for many hours as the staff tried to figure out what was wrong with me.

The monitors showed that I was having constant tiny contractions followed by much bigger ones, but fortunately, the doctor’s were able to confirm that my water had not broken and my cervix was still closed, which was a relief. They were never able to tell me what had caused them but after hours and hours of lying there hooked to monitors, they were able to give me an injection that stopped them. The side effects of the medicine were brutal and I don’t know that I’ve ever felt so sick or in such distress from a medicine as I did right afterwards, but I was assured that the medicine was for the baby’s benefit and not for mine. (I had to have a talk with the doctor in L&D about my preference that medicine be given only for Noah’s benefit and not my comfort, after the experience at Cornwall.)

Vanessa was with me in the ultrasound room immediately after the medicine was administered and got to see her brother for the first time. (Michael went to pick her up during all of this and my mother-in-law, Sue, stayed with me.) Nessa was thrilled and the technician was very kind to her, explaining everything along the way. I was suffering the side effects of the medicine during this test so I was turned away and trying to stay calm and taking solace in the fact that Nessa was at least distracted and enjoying herself (quite audibly). Near the end, I did have to ask the tech to please hurry as I did not think I could lay there any longer. I did get to see three quick images: one of Noah's nose and mouth (he has his daddy's bowed lips!), another of his boy parts (why the techs keep feeling the need to show me is beyond me!), and one of him sitting on his knees with his toes interlaced. It was nice to see him again in spite of all that was surrounding this ultrasound.

It was not long after the ultrasound was done that I realized I had been bleeding when they took me down to the ultrasound room by wheelchair and that it was still happening, so they raced me back upstairs to L&D where the doctors and nurses did... absolutely nothing. Seriously. They asked a question or two and then left me laying on the gurney for a couple more hours without so much as checking on me. They pretty much took my word that my water had not broken and I had little choice but to take theirs that it was caused from the very unpleasant exams I'd went through at the two hospitals. Needless to say Michael and I were very unhappy and have no immediate plans to ever return to that (or the previous) facility again.

It was an extremely long day and night but we made it through with God’s help. I had a couple of contractions once we got home but nothing serious and Noah was moving around like the happy baby he is. While we don’t know what yesterday was all about, we do know that Noah is completely fine and unaffected by any of it.

So, as of now, I am on a form of bed rest and am banned from shopping or doing anything that requires me to be on my feet for more than a set period of time. That should be interesting today as we are having a BBQ for Vanessa’s birthday today, but fortunately I trust Michael is competent to handle what needs to be done. This is the first time we have ever had Vanessa on her actual birthday and I hope it’s a day she’ll remember – and that yesterday is one we can all soon forget…

Follow-up Ultrasound and my Flashing Baby

2009-05-11T13:57:00.001-07:00

Well... today was the day we anxiously waited for, for the last four weeks: another chance to see little Noah. So did Noah cooperate for the "camera?"

In case you are wondering what this picture is depicting, it's Noah... hiding his face. Yes, Noah had his arms crossed in front of his face and his hands were somehow resting on the top of his head. No amount of turning was able to get him to face front...

I was feeling very sick and lightheaded today for some reason which made me have to stop the ultrasound a couple of times. Now that my belly is so much bigger, it is very very difficult for me to lay on my back and the pain was unbearable today.

I don't know what was up with me but I was having very very bad "hot pains" down my neck, terrible pressure in my head, my head was spinning and I felt like I was going to throw up. (Anyone who has ever had to have morphine can relate because that is exactly what it felt like. Very unsettling.) In all my excitement to see Noah today, I didn't take time to have a healthy breakfast so I guess that could be it... In any case, I see the OB on Wednesday so it might be worth mentioning. It was upsetting to say the least (especially because I was feeling so sick at several points that I had to turn on my side and close my eyes which made me miss out on the precious few moments I got to see him) but fortunately Noah seemed to be doing well and was moving around like crazy when I was watching. It was nearly impossible to get still images of him. The technician said he looked like a very happy baby and assured us that he will be beautiful. I have no doubt.

While we did not get to see baby's face (maybe a tiny bit here-- though if you look closely you can still see his hands up on his head), we did get to see that he has his Daddy's long legs...

And that he apparently shares his Mommy's love of Pilates!

In case you are confused by what you are seeing in this picture, Noah somehow has his legs up over his head (which you can see a small bit of at the bottom right -- under his hands which are still blocking his face). When he got in this position, I couldn't help but laugh. It's so amazing to watch my little guy doing gymnastics, especially now that I can feel it as I'm watching. I'm slowly getting better at being able to decipher what Noah's movements are when I feel them. (Lately, he has been rolling a lot! That is always a fun feeling. lol)

The ultrasound tech gave us a good laugh by noting that while Noah was very shy about showing his face, he was not at all shy about showing off that he is a boy. (She called him a "flasher." lol) Yes, that is my son in all his glory... Seems this is a photo he does not mind taking as it's very similar to what happened at the last ultrasound when he also was breach and not cooperative in facing front. For some reason he likes to moon us, I guess. Boys will be boys...

It was good to see that he is doing OK in there though it would have been nice to have a face-shot. He is growing right on target... And the good news is that the cyst that was found in his brain at the last ultrasound is now completely gone! Thank God -- And I do! Though this may mean it will be the last ultrasound we'll have... I am glad to know that whatever it was - it really was nothing to worry about. :)

My Mother's Day Surprise

2009-05-09T19:53:00.000-07:00

This Mother's Day, I am reminded of just how blessed I am to have such a loving (and beautiful!) stepdaughter and husband.

Michael, Vanessa and I just got back from my sister-in-law Jen's wedding, which was absolutely wonderful (a longer post and pics to follow soon!)... Because Vanessa goes home to her mom early tomorrow morning --we are giving her back an hour earlier this year than we usually do so that we can see precious Tyler Gibson get dedicated-- she gave me my Mother's Day card and gift tonight. I thought I'd share as it was exceptionally cute!

Presented in a beautiful gift bag was the softest teddy bear ever with a balloon and a box of chocolates and candy... and two cards.... I not only got a card from Vanessa for Mother's Day this year, but from my unborn son, Noah, as well! You can imagine my surprise.

As she does every year, Vanessa wrote me a beautiful card... I could really see how much she has grown up by what she wrote this year all on her own...

As for "Noah's card," I just couldn't pass up the opportunity to share it with you....

If you click any of the images above, you will be able to see it much more clearly, but just in case you can't see the blue writing in particular (my dear husband's), I just had to reproduce it below:

"Roses are Red, Violets are blue
I am in your belly, nauseating you!
I am growing really big
and am doing just fine
Wishing you the very best
Mother of mine :)"

This Mother's Day, I cannot thank God enough for my beautiful growing family... I could not love Vanessa any more if she were my own and I am so glad and feel so privileged to be able to give her a baby brother and to be able to give my dear husband a son! It amazes me to think that (God-willing) at this time next year, I'll not only be "Ma," I'll be "Mommy!"

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY TO ALL THE OTHER MOMS AND MOMS-TO-BE OUT THERE!

Love, Nan<3

State of Our Union: The First 1,000 Days :)

2009-05-07T13:02:00.001-07:00

Yes, yes, I am a little lame (I covered this in my last post), but I couldn’t let today go by without mentioning that today marks a milestone in our marriage. Michael and I have now been married for 1,000 days. J I cannot believe how far we both have come in such a short period of time and how much God has done in our lives. God-willing we will be seeing our family grow when we welcome Baby Noah in just a few more months. Time has been flying!

I was looking through our pictures this week and I can’t believe how much we have gone through since we met each other and how much we have overcome… not to mention how many different hairstyles and colors I have had over the years! LOL

(If I were to post ALL of our pics, I’d be here for another 1,000 days so here are a few from the archives J)

Marriage is a true blessing. Like any couple, we have shared ups and downs but the important thing is that all of it has made us stronger. I truly believe that God uses marriage to grow people and I know that God has been growing us especially as of late (especially me, quite physically!)

Just thought I’d share that today... 2 days before my sister-in-law walks down the aisle and starts her own countdown! (Marriage brings out the corn dog in us all, I'm sure she'll have one!)

Countdown until we see Noah again: 4 more days! I cannot wait!

Noah <3's Yertle!

2009-04-30T10:55:00.000-07:00

Noah is very slowly but surely learning that his mommy is a bit of a nerd! I just explained that to him a moment ago while he was kicking around in my belly. (He still is!) It's better that he finds that out now :)

Last night, I was SO bored and tired of thinking about mediation finals and motions for summary judgment that I decided to take the advice I'd read on baby center now that I know my little one can hear me... and so I read to Noah.

I sat in Noah's empty nursery on the glider and ottoman I got dirt cheap at a yard sale and pulled out the copy of "All the Places You'll Go" that Michael got me when I started law school and I read to my baby for the first time. (A nerd... and a corn dog, what can I say?) I'm sentimental...

Noah must have been sleeping because I didn't get much of a response from him, and I doubt that ANYONE with a pulse can avoid responding with joy to anything written by Dr. Seuss! So

later last night I read to him again but once again there was little response. Maybe he is just not a fan, I thought. Maybe the words were too big for him. haha :)

Well just now as I was sitting drafting my motion, I felt Noah hiccuping and starting to stir and I decided I wasn't giving up so easily! And I thought of a Dr. Seuss character who had that same philosophy (much to his own detriment!) I looked up Yertle the Turtle, my ultimate favorite Dr. Seuss classic and I found the text online and read it to him. (Did I mention I once had a turtle name Myrtle because she liked to be up high like Yertle and kept falling? Yes... definitely a corndog...)

As I was reading, Noah kicked around and moved the whole time! (He still is!) When I was done reading it to him I told him it was not the last of Seuss he'd hear. I couldn't see for sure but I bet he was smiling, granted he has the necessary facial muscles at this point, which I doubt. I'm sure he was on the inside (no pun intended lol). I have big plans to try and collect them all for him. And then I explained that mommy is a little bit of a nerd which he would find out soon and that I would be reading to him a lot in person someday when I could see him face to face. He kicked me when I said that and I just looked down at my belly and wished I could see him in there. It's such a strange thing to see all this movement and try to envision what is going on beneath the surface.

For now, this will have to be enough :)

I can't wait to meet him!

Half-way there!

2009-04-27T10:10:00.000-07:00

We are now more than halfway through the pregnancy and my anticipation is growing twice as fast as my morning sickness is dying down (that unfortunately is not happening so fast at all!) Who knows, maybe it will end before Noah arrives! :)

This past week took us into the woods and brought me out of my comfort zone – briefly. We are now all moved into our new home, which could not be more beautiful or perfect – unless bugs (spiders and beetles and bees, Oh my!) were instantly eradicated from the face of the earth! (Our great thanks again to Mark and Julie for the wonderful opportunity to live here!) Moving while pregnant was a lot harder than I thought it would be but we were blessed to have two of the men from our Bible study help us (aka Michael) with the heavy lifting. I was content to empty boxes and organize the kitchen. I still have a lot more to tackle but I’m taking it in stride. J Noah barely moved on the last day of our move and I was a little worried but he has since been kicking up a storm and I am very relieved to be able to report that – however much my ribs are aching!

This weekend was exciting for two reasons: First, Vanessa FINALLY got to feel her baby brother kick! After trying all day Friday and Saturday to show her exactly where to rest her hands and practically begging Noah, “Kick your sister!” assuring him I would never tell him to do so again, finally on Saturday night Vanessa got kicked! And she could not have been happier about it! She had spent most of the weekend talking to my belly and encouraging Noah to wake up. I was so glad he finally did and let her know he could hear her! Second, last night, after what was a very very stressful day for reasons I will not get into for fear of getting myself worked up again but that was through no fault of my wonderful husband or stepchild… I finally SAW Noah kick. Yes, the moment I was waiting for… where I could see the little kicks THROUGH my skin finally happened! Of course, no one was there to witness it so I am hoping that Noah won’t make a liar out of me when I try to show his Daddy later tonight. :)

In just two more weeks we will get to see our little boy again! I can hardly wait...

3 more milestones and many more to come… We are now more than halfway there! :)

Updates on Life & Pregnancy

2009-04-14T06:00:00.001-07:00

Easter weekend was very eventful –as was yesterday– in terms of my pregnancy and life in general! On Saturday, I had an extremely rough day. I was very dizzy and lightheaded and had very bad contractions and severe pains in my abdomen and back. My family was visiting so I just tried to take it easy while they went shopping with Michael and focused on the fact that my next OB appointment would be in a couple of days. – It was yesterday. My family’s visit was in no way ruined by all of this. They got to feel Noah’s kicks and we had a really great time catching up.

Noah’s heartbeat sounded great and the doctor laughed because as soon as she put the fetal Doppler on my belly, he “kicked her and ran away!” She discussed the ultrasound results with us and assured us that in her opinion everything would be OK. The ultrasound that confirmed Noah’s gender found a very small cyst (4mm) in the left ventricle in Noah’s brain. My ultrasound technician, the radiological doctor and my OB assured us that they see this all the time and that as long as there are no other abnormalities (which in Noah’s case there aren’t) it is nothing to worry about whatsoever. To give me some reassurance, my OB is sending me for another ultrasound (and another opportunity to see my baby) in four weeks. She said if it has not resolved itself by then, not to worry because sometimes they don’t resolve until after the baby is born but that it will have no effect on the baby whatsoever. Still, we’d appreciate prayer that this does resolve itself as soon as possible…

I finally gained a little bit of weight (finally broke 120!) but my OB talked to me about the need to try to start eating more. (I still have no appetite and the morning sickness still has not resolved but I have been force-feeing myself for Noah's sake.) She assured me that the baby is getting everything he needs but that I am probably not and that this could be one of the reasons I've been so sick. She informed me that I should have went to the ER on Saturday during that episode and warned me that next time that would be the prudent thing to do. Note taken.

After my prenatal checkup, my OB sent me for an ultrasound of my kidneys and bladder. Fortunately, the results came back fine and there were no kidney stones which I was fearing. The ultrasound gave me another opportunity to see Noah who was upside down, with his head pressing on my bladder and not being at all shy about the fact he is a boy. LOL. As soon as the the ultrasound started, the technician started laughing and said "Yeah... he is DEFINITELY a boy. He is spread eagle right now." There was no doubt about it in my mind. It was good to laugh. He was moving around like crazy the whole time. Noah is a very active little baby!

The ultrasound technician assured me (even though I was not there about Noah) that she also sees these cysts all the time and that in her whole career she has never known a baby to have problems because of a solitary cyst. She said she knew of one woman – a friend – whose baby was born with it and it eventually just resolved itself with no side effects. Hearing this was a blessing and really put my mind at ease. She also said that the pain in my back could be because of all the injuries in my spine so that was comforting. (Better it be something I already have - and know I have - than something new!)

Aside from all of this, Michael and I also got some other exciting news: we are moving… THIS WEEKEND… into our new home. I am a little worried as I have my final trial for Advanced Trial Advocacy on Sunday night and can't imagine building a whole case (I get the fact pattern tonight) and being prepared in time while moving -- though it's pretty certain that I won't be doing very much in the way of moving, pregnant as I am! We and many people were praying for this to happen quickly, so more proof that God indeed works fast. Yesterday Michael and I made a trip out and dropped off some clothes and I put all the gifts my family bought Noah in his little closet. It is all beginning to feel more and more real. God is so faithful…

It's a.... BLESSING!

2009-04-11T04:50:00.000-07:00

It’s funny how quickly total peace can lead to complete joy! Yesterday was off to a rough start when I discovered that someone hit and ran my car earlier that morning. Long story short, my side door will likely need to be replaced in its entirety and whoever did it didn't even leave a note. (Should this surprise me?) I resolved not to let this (or any other bad news) ruin what was to be such an important and special day for Michael and me. By 12:20 we were at the doctors and too excited for words... Once we had arrived, the issue with my car seemed trivial at best. We were about to get news that would change our lives and our family forever. (Sounds dramatic, I know, but it's really true, as anyone who has been through this process herself likely knows.) What past announcement could possibly have matched this in anticipation? None that I could recall.

That sense of peace I blogged about earlier had not left me. For the first time, I really did not care what the baby would be, I was just eager to know him or her by name. The minute the ultrasound began, with the very first image that appeared on the screen, I was positive -- 100% certain -- that I knew what the baby was… and I was right!

A beautiful baby BOY! Long story short (and without obvious explanation), even upside-down, our little baby was undeniably male.

Tears came streaming down my face as Michael held onto my hand while the technician gave us the news I happily suspected was coming. Happy tears. We were looking at our SON: Noah.

All along I had wanted for a strong biblical name for our child if it was a boy – and I could think of none better. Noah trusted God with all he had – to the point of ridicule and scorn. God tasked him with a mission that might have seemed too big or even impossible (perhaps at times even laughable) and Noah obeyed. I hope this name will be a blessing to our son and I look forward to the day he’ll be able to understand what it really and truly means. (AKA: It may have been the character in "The Notebook's" name, but that is NOT why we chose it. lol).

Noah was face down and breech, facing my spine, which made the ultrasound harder to conduct. It was no wonder to me that he had made himself more comfortable after I’d spent the day before feeling like target practice as he kicked and punched me in the ribs repeatedly between 2pm and 2am! He had finally turned around and settled down – or so we thought! Though he didn’t flip over and let us get a good profile shot of his little face, he did move around quite a bit. We even saw his little nostrils (his "nares") as well as his tiny mouth opening and closing – dare I say he has my husband’s kissy lips! I am thankful to God for that!

We did get another “scary” baby shot (unmissable - above), which is always nice! As far as I'm concerned no profile shot could ever be as precious as the very first we got of our baby boy back in February. I look at that picture everyday!

My favorite ultrasound photo from yesterday was when we got a glimpse of Noah's precious feet and toes -- which so far fortunately look nothing like either of his parents'!! LOL The technician made sure every one of them was there.

Michael and I got a glimpse of just about every vital organ our baby has and were assured that he is perfect… however, he is measuring even further ahead than last time. The technician recommended that our due date be set back based on the 16 week ultrasound to 09/02/09 (one week back) but that based on this one, that it be set back to 08/31/09. It seems our little guy is eager to see us too!

So right after finding out the news, I took my smashed in car and headed to Party City where I got some decorations to set up my surprise for the nursery. I could think of no better way to tell my family who would be visiting from New York that night the news. I made Nessa a blue Easter basket and moped about the fact that she’d have to wait 2 whole weeks to see it. I wished so much she could have been there...

After grocery shopping, I came home to a surprise of my own. I opened the door to the laundry machine at Michael’s request and there was my beautiful stepdaughter sitting on top of the dryer. I cried my eyes out. She was all that had been missing from such an important day for our family and I was in shock that she was actually there. It seems there was a mix-up about the visitation and she will be here until tonight. So it turned out that my nursery surprise which I’d been saving for my family ended up surprising Nessa first! Her reaction was too precious for words!
She was so excited about the prospect of having a baby brother that she immediately started making signs for the nursery expressing her love for him. Though I know she had been hoping for a baby sister, I could see that her joy and excitement were genuine.

The look on her face was priceless and I was thrilled to capture it! My family arrived at 2 in the morning and I shared the news again in the same manner. Because it was 2 in the morning I didn't get pictures but the responses were in no way muted by the time or travel that had brought them here.

It was a wonderful day – so much better than I had dreamed the night before and more than I had ever hoped for!

The baby we have unfortunately had to refer to for so long as "it" and lovingly called "Baby Luns" for lack of a better name is now Baby Noah - Noah Thomas Lunsford - and it’s all exactly as it should be. We could not be happier!

Total Peace

2009-04-10T07:54:00.000-07:00

I've been having a lot of anxiety over finding out the gender of this child. I leave here in twenty minutes to go get the news. I've been certain all along that the baby is Ava Grace and not some unnamed male child. Well... last night I fell asleep praying to God for peace about it -- that I would be able to be happy no matter what they tell me today. I had a dream last night that the ultrasound confirmed it was a BOY. I did not wake up feeling very peaceful. I prayed some more and Michael and I talked and after praying and talking I have total peace about it being either or. We came up with a boy name so now I will know this baby by name TODAY no matter what it is. (I hope you will all love it as much as we do!) And I actually feel excited about the possibility that it's a little boy and not a girl! Though I will be happy with knowing that our baby (whoever he or she may be) is healthy and growing! I have faith that God has a plan for this child's life and I feel nothing but blessed to be discovering a part of that plan today.

I wanted to share that with you. I think we forget sometimes that God does answer our prayers (how ever trivial they may seem) when we seek Him and even though sometimes His answer to our specific request is "no," He is always willing to give us the comfort we need to accept it. Whether the answer to whether my instincts about gender have been right or wrong is yes or no, I have real peace and I pray for that for all of you...

By 1pm our baby will have a name!

Love, Nan<3

Known By Name

2009-04-08T08:32:00.000-07:00

In just 2 days, Michael and I will know (God-willing) whether we are going to have a son or a daughter. Friday’s ultrasound is what I have been waiting for anxiously for the last 4 ½ months. The idea of knowing our child by name this coming Friday is enough to make my head spin. The problem is… if it’s a boy, we won’t…

From day one, I have felt (for whatever reason) that Michael and I are going to have a little girl. I have spent a lot of time in prayer about this and the name Ava Grace just found its way into my heart and has not let up for a single moment. There is no doubt in my mind that if it’s a girl, that is her name. Still, I’ve felt guilty that Michael and I have not been able to narrow down boy names to any reasonable certainty. I have prayed that God will give us a boy name if that’s what we are going to have – but so far no answer. Not that I doubt that He’ll eventually answer – perhaps this is a lesson in patience – but it makes me sad to think that if we find out on Friday that we are going to have a little boy, he will be a nameless little boy (though no less loved!)

And it got me thinking.

How amazing is it that God already knows our Little One by name? Whatever this child is, it is, and God has known all the while, while we (and everyone else) have speculated and wondered. Even if our child will be nameless to us this coming Friday and however long thereafter it takes us to decide upon a name, God already knows what that name is. What an awesome thought!

My family is coming in on Friday night and I am excited to finally be able to share exciting news in person – something that has been inhibited by the distance between us now that Virginia is my permanent home. No matter what the result, there will be a lot of joy. It will bring us all one step closer to coming face to face with this precious gift from God.

Just two more days…

God Works Fast

2009-03-30T05:31:00.000-07:00

With the downturned economy, with both Michael and me working and in school to try and make end’s meet, with my job about to end any day now without another lined up, with bills piling up – and with a baby on the way in the midst of such uncertain times, I have spent a lot of time worrying about the future. Although I am well aware of the biblical mandate not to worry or be anxious for anything (included in my last post, if I recall), the week before last found me really struggling and by Friday night of that week (after a very bad week indeed) I felt entirely downcast. I shared some of these misgivings with our home group that night. It was very difficult to hide my emotions. (I blame it on the pregnancy hormones!) Our small group rallied around us and prayed over us, assuring us that everything would be OK and reminding us that God had a plan and would work out the details. But in the midst of such much stress and anxiety it was hard to truly believe it even though my head knew it—there was a certain disconnect in my heart. It really had been a BAD week.

Little did I know that in one short week, God would answer our prayers in a bigger way than I ever could have dreamed of. In my view of our situation, I had limited God. Fortunately, our God has no limits.

This past Friday Michael and I were shocked when we came upstairs after Bible study to find our small group singing “Happy Birthday” to us. I thought there had been some horrible mistake and said “It’s not our birthdays.” Someone called out “Yes, but your baby will have one!” We looked around and this is what we saw…

Our small group had banded together to show us that God would provide and that He would do that, especially, through the people we are blessed to have in our lives. Among the items we received were a playard, a travel bassinette, a diaper genie with refills, a baby monitor and every toy you can imagine, just to name a few! (There was much more.) In that moment, I became so aware of just how blessed we have been to have such wonderful and generous people in our lives. (Not that I didn't know that already -- but I realized that God had sent them into our lives for a reason.) What a beautiful reminder that everything would be OK and that we’d have people around us to help us through the tough times as well as share in the good!

But the blessings did not end there! That night -- before we had even left our small group -- Michael got a call from his cousin Marc and his wife Julie, who we had just visited the week before, offering us an extremely generous opportunity to change our living arrangements for the better that will allow us to get out of debt and begin saving for our impending arrival as well as have much more room for our growing family. This move will also allow us to be much closer to Michael's family, which is a blessing in and of itself. It was all so much to take in and so fast. My head was spinning and this time I don’t think the pregnancy hormones had anything to do with it!

I had worked through how our situation would turn out time and time again, but never did I envision THIS. That God had worked so fast in this situation was dizzying, but it should not have been surprising. That night when I went to bed I just thanked God and asked for forgiveness for all my doubts. God has always met our needs when we sought Him in prayer. (Not always our wants, but always our needs and He has always known what those are better than us. This time He surpassed even that.) Though I knew this full well, I had allowed the situation to become bigger than God in my mind. How wonderful that God is bigger than any obstacle we encounter – and that He has a plan much bigger and better than any we could envision for ourselves.

To say we are blessed is an understatement but these are the best words I can find right now. Truly blessed!

I hope this will be a testimony of God's power and mercy and provision. I know there are so many people in these uncertain times who are struggling as we have been and I hope this will be a reminder that God has everything in the palm of His hands, that He is intimately concerned with what is going on in our lives, and that He WILL provide... that no matter how grim things seem, God is in control and He is bigger than the problems of this world. We need only put our hope in Him.

“For this reason I say to you, do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air; they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father keeps feeding them. Are you not worth much more than they?" Matthew 6:25-26

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

A Blessed Weekend With a Surprise Ending

2009-03-23T07:21:00.000-07:00

Now that I have entered nesting mode, I’ve begun getting a little anxious about how life will change and how M and I will adjust to all of those changes. By the end of what had been a terrible week last week, I was feeling extremely disheartened. In no time at all we were we surrounded by so many supportive people expressing a willingness to help us out and keep us in prayer. Our Friday night Bible study group, in particular, has been a huge blessing and perfectly timed for that matter! But the blessings did not stop on Friday night!

On Saturday, M’s cousins Mark & Julie graciously gave us a bunch of furniture and various other extremely useful items that will certainly help once the baby arrives. We had a great time visiting with them and their beautiful children, especially the youngest girl who kept asking me what I thought the baby was doing every so often and who wondered out loud if the baby was walking when I was walking. She even announced at one point: "I think he's dancing!" I haven’t had much interaction with young children and so this was a very good experience for me. M and I also got to visit with his grandparents – our little one’s great grandparents-to-be. We went from having a horrible week to a wonderful weekend. It was a fast turn around!
On Sunday, the music at McLean Bible was exactly what I needed to hear in light of all that had happened in the previous week. It really spoke right to my soul and reminded me that no matter how big any of our problems seem, God is truly in control and He has a plan for good if we just trust Him and not limit Him. Lon’s sermon also echoed this message and it instilled in me even more so the need to put away whatever doubts and fears I've let creep in. I really needed to hear it. And just then, when the blessings were abounding, came another HUGE blessing: I felt the baby move! And when I mean move, I mean it felt as though the baby was practically dancing! lol

Now, all week, I’ve been suspecting that I was feeling the baby as I got little tickles and flutters that lasted a few seconds and then went away in certain isolated spots. But after the music ended (and a cup of coffee I had before church, I’m sure!) the baby was going CRAZY on the left side of my belly. I could not believe what I was feeling. Throughout the whole sermon, the baby would start moving again and I must admit, it was a little unsettling at first, I could not have been more excited! I certainly didn’t expect to feel so much movement all at once! It was like I was being attacked with tickles. I nearly came out of my seat a couple of times.

And so yesterday as I took nice long walk to get some much needed exercise and fresh air, I thought back to what Mark and Julie’s little girl had said that Sunday on her great granddad’s chair and I laughed to myself. It did feel like the baby was walking too!

All is Well...

2009-03-16T16:26:00.000-07:00

This morning, M and I went to see the OB for my routine prenatal visit (15 weeks down!). As expected, we got the results of the ultrasound I had on Friday. The doctor said that both the baby and I look "perfect," so all seems to be well. That is a great relief and a huge blesssing! She was not sure why I am in so much pain but expressed hope that it would resolve itself soon. I am hopeful too...

We also got another opinion (our 4th) on delivery. This doctor also expressed her belief that I'll need to have a C-Section this coming September. She also stressed that she believed going under general anesthesia would be safe for both me and the baby. Of course, we are still praying through this and haven't made any decisions yet. We still have to meet with the anesthesiologist and have that individual review my surgical reports, etc.

In the meantime, I am continuing to grow and have now reached the point where none of my regular clothes fit anymore. I literally took every pair of jeans and pants I own and boxed them tonight. Today, I was blessed to have a shopping buddy in my friend Melody who is set to deliver in the coming weeks! I must say, it was a lot more fun (and less depressing!) having someone there with me who could relate and give honest advice. I had attempted to go shopping by myself a week ago and was demoralized. I realized I might have to give up wearing my precious purple for a while, as I start to look more and more like Barney the Dinosaur! (Except of course for my sister-in-laws upcoming wedding!! :) Anyone who has been pregnant knows that it is a little jarring to see how much one's body changes so suddenly. (Fortunately, so far it's been all belly for me). It's mostly exciting, of course, as I realize that as I grow, it means our baby is growing too. And right now everything indicates that baby is growing strong and healthy!

My next ultrasound is scheduled for next month. We find out the gender in just 25 days -- if the baby stops crossing its legs, that is! In just 25 days we will know our son or daughter by name. What an awesome thought!

A Recent Scare and Another Glimpse of Baby

2009-03-14T07:02:00.000-07:00

Contrary to conventional wisdom, the 2nd trimester has not brought relief from the morning sickness that began in the 1st. In many ways, it has gotten worse as time has passed – though, I must say, I have gotten much better at dealing with it and staying positive in spite of it. So far, little of my experience has been aligned with all of what I was told would and should happen. The most recent example was a scare over the past few days, which ultimately brought a huge blessing when Michael and I were able to get another glimpse of baby girl or boy Luns yesterday afternoon.
On Thursday night, some issues arose that caused the doctor on call to warn me of a possible late miscarriage. I was expecting the doctor to reassure me and tell me that everything happening was completely normal and not to worry, but to no avail. Nothing could have prepared me for this suggestion or possibility. Again -- conventional wisdom says it’s very rare this late in the game and I have had a peace throughout the last few months that everything is and will be OK that was shaken by the nonchalant way the doctor voiced her opinion. Needless to say, I was extremely upset – not to mention in terrible pain, which was not improved by getting worked up. Michael did an amazing job in keeping me as calm as possible until the next morning when we were able to go to the OB to get a better idea of what was going on. Sadly, I fell asleep while he was praying over the baby and me, but his prayers obviously worked, as I was able to sleep through the night for the first time in a long time without waking up from crazy nightmares. I needed that extra rest to prepare for the day we’d have yesterday.

First thing the next morning we were at the OB. We immediately heard the baby’s heartbeat, which was strong and perfect as it has been each time we’ve heard it. The doctor (my regular OB) reassured me that this was a great sign, but after examining me he still had some questions and so he referred me for an emergency ultrasound to make sure everything was OK. At this point, his thoughts were that perhaps the placenta had detached at some point... though all signs pointed to it being in tact given the heart rate was normal and there were no signs of distress. And so we spent the day in waiting for hours until we could get in to have the test.

Ultimately, the ultrasound technician was not able to tell us much, though she did suggest that it could be a “low lying placenta” causing the problem and her only hypothesis about the pain I was feeling was that it was either contractions (which are normal at this stage of the game) or perhaps some effects from my endometriosis which was always a pain (literally) in the past. The technician suggested that the fact that the radiologist was faxing the report to my doctor and not calling him was a good sign. Nevertheless, now all we can do is wait for my next routine prenatal this Monday morning to get the results. Only a few more days…

In any event, Michael and I got to see our little baby move around for the first time yesterday. The baby at first laid still and looked like it was hiccupping and twitching but after a while, it started to move its arms and legs and flail around. By the end of the test, it looked like it was dancing!

This test was two-dimensional so some of the images were not quite as precious as those we saw on the last ultrasound.

It was nice to have a laugh though in the midst of all our worry. The technician said that baby was measuring a week ahead and that she would give her opinion on the gender – but by then the baby had gone from sitting in what she called “Indian style” to laying with its legs crossed. I joked with Michael that that must mean it’s a girl as it was sitting very lady-like. Only God knows…

So the long story short (and I guess this has become a little longer than I would have liked) is that we are back where we started… waiting… but a little reassured that everything will be OK. It’s all in God’s hands and we are blessed to have so many people praying for us. Thanks again.

Nan<3

"Consider it pure joy... whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." James 2-4

"For God gave us not a spirit of fearfulness; but of power and love and discipline." 2 Timothy 1:7

A Close Up Look At Baby Luns

2009-02-23T10:22:00.000-08:00

This morning, Michael and I got a close up look at our little baby when we had our 12 week ultrasound -- our last of the first trimester, which ends next week. Although we were told we'd have to wait until week 18 or 20, we discovered that the office had failed to schedule me for a routine prenatal test that would give us the opportunity to get a glimpse sooner. Naturally, we scheduled it right away. It was a wonderful experience. In spite of all the books I've read I wasn't quite expecting to see our baby looking as "baby-like" as he or she did. All along I have pictured our baby much in the way he or she appeared in our last ultrasound... How Baby Luns has grown!

The baby seemed very peaceful and didn't move at all so it made it much easier for us to get a good look. We had the chance to get a close-up of his or her little face, nose, legs, arms and feet. Its hand was up at its face as though it was sucking its thumb. (I really hate to use the word "it" but when I wrote "his or her" it made the sentence nearly unreadable.) I can't wait to find out what we should call our baby... but for now seeing his or her face was the perfect medicine for all that's been ailing me. I recently decided to stop taking all my medicines and I am just trying to pray through the morning sickness, which was not helped by nearly 24 hours of being in the car this past weekend travelling between Virginia and Tennesee. I'm hopeful that I'll be like "most women" who see an end to the nausea at the end of the first trimester. Right now, I feel invincible! I just keep picturing that precious face. It makes it all much more bearable. Couldn't wait to share these pictures with all of you!

2nd OB Appointment

2009-02-16T17:10:00.000-08:00

Well, today, Michael and I went to our 2nd OB appointment and we had the good fortune of having Vanessa with us on account of the President’s Day holiday. Sadly, we did not get another glimpse of our little munchkin but we did get to hear our baby’s heartbeat again and Vanessa got a chance to listen in on her baby brother or sister for the first time. Apart from that, the appointment was very uneventful… save a conversation I had with the OB about the most prudent delivery options we should be considering.

Dr. B became the 2nd OB who has told me it will be medically necessary to have a Cesarean to deliver our baby this coming August or September. Given the injuries to my spine, my past medical history, and the unlikelihood that the doctors will be able to get a needle into my spine that would allow me to stay awake, the doctor recommended that I consider going under general anesthesia (translation = totally unconscious). He explained that they would be able to get the baby out in 1-2 minutes and that the anesthesia wouldn’t have an affect on the baby unless the surgery took 8 minutes, which it shouldn’t given that I’ve never had abdominal surgery before. I really was not prepared to have this conversation, which I assumed would be much further off. However, I guess now is as good a time as any to start praying for guidance from God on this.

I should explain that I am not one of those women who are terribly distraught by the proposition of having to give birth by Cesarean. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I always suspected it would be necessary given everything I’ve been through with my spine (surgeries, accidents, etc.). That said, I also didn’t grow up dreaming about having major surgery to deliver my firstborn -- or that I would be prohibited from holding him or her right away. If we do end up taking the doctor’s advice, it may be much longer before I could hold my baby. It’s also hard to imagine going to sleep and not knowing what events will follow (not that we ever really know what the future has in store anyway but it certainly makes me feel less in control and reminds me that I’m not and God is). This all obviously makes me a little sad (not that God is in control, but the negative aspects that surround this type of birth plan). There is just so much to consider in terms of risks and benefits. Right now, my doctors have made a good case that this would be safest for our baby, which is my top priority right now. Michael and I will certainly be praying very hard about this and trusting God with all we’ve got. In the end, God is in control and the sooner we accept that, the better able we will be to deal with whatever comes our way.

As for the morning sickness, the doctor prescribed another medication that I am hoping will help as I have still been feeling as green as Kermit if not greener than last week. I was also given a referral to a pulmonary specialist to try to get my asthma under control. Breathing has been as much of an issue these days as getting and keeping my food down.

So far pregnancy has been a very trying experience but I know God will grow me and Michael through it... as well as our baby (haha). For all the downsides, I could not be happier. Speaking of growing… I got fitted for my bridesmaid’s gown for my good friend Emily’s wedding this June. Apparently, I will be doing a lot of growing between now and then! How wonderful and terrifying!

A Rough Week

2009-02-02T14:49:00.000-08:00

Some pregnant women positively glow! Believe me, I know. Just recently, four of my closest friends gave birth and I have five more close friends who are currently expecting the arrivals of their little bundles of joy. Other pregnant gals, who are not so lucky, don’t have that tell-tale rosy complexion to boast of. Some of us (like me) are positively green. As Kermit the Frog once eloquently put it “It’s not easy being green.” (Pregnancy also makes a woman very punchy, it appears. I am living proof. Not that I wasn’t a corn-dog to begin with…)

Week 9 (the completion of my 8th week – for those of you who are confused by the strange “pregnancy math” which counts pregnancy 2 weeks before conception – and my pregnancy counter which suggest that I’m as bad at math as you already suspect I am) was the roughest yet. Aside from coming down with the worst flu imaginable, I have been adverse to just about anything that resembles food and unable to digest what little food I could tolerate swallowing. It has been a trying time indeed! But I was thinking to myself today, as I trekked back from physical therapy (my first time leaving the house on my own in a week since I came down with the flu), that I can think of no better reason to be feeling this bad. It’s definitely worth it!

As if feeling bad was not enough, I have never looked so bad in my life. (This increases my belief that our baby is going to be a girl as I’ve heard the old wives tale many times that girls steal their mother’s beauty!). It's not that I've gained a lot of weight (the idea of which, amazingly doesn't scare me in the least, in spite of the fact that this is the thinnest I've ever been. Seeing my weight go up would make me feel better as at least then I'd know that the baby is getting all that it needs from the very little I've been able to digest.) It's not even that I lack a rosy glow or that I look more akin to an alligator than an apple. After going through 2 ½ large boxes of tissues in 2 ½ days, I can tell you that as cute as having a little baby bump may be, it is not cute to have half a nose. I am surprised I have one left at all! What remains is red and lined with deep scratches and dry peeling off skin. Not a pretty sight…

Constant nausea and the feeling that no amount of rest can ever fully satisfy my need to sleep has not given me great incentive to dress up or make myself presentable as I am usually inclined to do. On Friday night, Michael and I took Vanessa to get a bite to eat. I was dressed… comfortably (lol). I heard the waiter ask Michael how many kid’s menus he needed. I wasn’t in the best mood that night so I just shook my head, a little annoyed. (It’s not like this hasn’t happened before and well… I wasn’t wearing makeup or heels and I AM pretty short). Well, yesterday, we found ourselves far from home at lunch-time again and decided to go to Chili’s to get a quick bite. As I stood by Michael and Vanessa’s side I heard the waitress ask “kid’s menu?” Michael said yes. I assumed it was for Vanessa. You can imagine my reaction when I sat down to lunch next to Vanessa to find that we both had matching kid’s menus and crayons of assorted colors. My mood was a lot better so I laughed it off and took advantage of the opportunity to order a 5 dollar meal that I knew I was just going to waste anyway, just as I’ve wasted just about every other meal that’s been put in front of me these last few weeks. A little red hooded sweatshirt went a long way. It was a little inconvenient to find that I had not been entrusted with a butter knife but it certainly added some humor to my day. At least I don’t have a complex about getting old… :)

Being pregnant has really made me laugh at my preconceptions about what this experience would be like. I had always joked with Michael that I was looking forward to pregnancy as being the first time in my life I could eat whatever I wanted (not that I am one of those girls who perpetually diet or anything). But it was our joke. I never could have imagined that I would dread having to eat or feel sickened at the thought of my favorite meals. I’m Italian, afterall. I love food! It is upsetting to feel so averse to just about everything. I’m told that after the 3rd month I should start feeling better and be able to keep down more of what I eat and what our baby needs. In the meantime, the prenatal vitamins fill in the gaps created by the impending nausea and I do my best to eat as healthy as I can (when I can).

We have now entered month 3. Our second prenatal visit is in a little more than 2 weeks. I wonder if we’ll get to see our little baby again… Our baby, in case you were wondering, is now the size of a kumquat! Just yesterday, he or she was just a little grape!

We’ll keep you posted!

First Glimpse of Baby

2009-01-20T16:54:00.000-08:00

It's only been two weeks since my last OB appointment but everyday since then has seemed like an eternity as we awaited our first ultrasound: our first opportunity to get a glimpse of the tiny little miracle that has been growing inside of me since December. Well, today finally came and our appointment with the new OB could not have gone better... or been more surprising!

This morning, M and I not only saw our little baby boy or girl for the first time -- we got to hear his or her little heartbeat! It was amazing. The heartbeat was strong at 158bpm. When I heard the sound I wasn't sure what it was. I nearly came off the table (which would not have been good, needless to say!) "What was that?" I asked as I was still recovering from the shock of seeing our little baby blob. "Your baby's heartbeat," the doctor replied. He found it again and gave us a second opportunity to listen. I could have listened to it all day (something I'm sure my insurance would not have covered and my OB would not have agreed to). I was in disbelief, as I'd been told that it would be way too early to hear anything. It was such a wonderful surprise and it definitely help put this whole experience into perspective. Now, when I feel a wave of nausea I remember what it's all for and I think of that beautiful little flashing speck on the ultrasound and it all seems worth it.

So... our next appointment is for 11 weeks and that cannot come soon enough for me. I can't wait to see how much out little guy or gal will change in just 4 short weeks (God-willing). And who knows how much my little baby bump will grow by then. Time will surely tell! :)

“For You formed my inmost being. You knit me together in my mother's womb. I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Your works are wonderful. My soul knows that very well.” Psalm 139:13-14