Slightly before one o'clock this morning, I was told to say goodbye to Michael and enter the operating room. I really wish I could have done so blindfolded as it looked more like a chamber of torture than a hospital room. I was laid upon the table for what seemed like an eternity as I was strapped down, undressed, catheterized and drawn upon. My body was shaking the whole time from either the cold or my nerves or both. Dr. C told me that the same thing happened to her, but this was not reassuring. I never felt so scared in my whole life as I did laying there. I kept praying as hard as I could for God to give me peace about the surgery but as I was doing so, the anesthesiologists and nurses were moving at rapid fire pace without explaining anything to me. Out of nowhere a mask was brought down on my face and I suddenly could not breathe. Because I was strapped down everywhere all I could do was jerk my face out from under it to indicate that I could not breathe. The anesthesiologist told me that I would fall asleep soon but I could not help but fight to get away from the mask that was making it impossible for me to take a breath. Eventually (obviously) I fell asleep.
I woke up in the recovery room to see Michael feeding Noah a bottle. I could not really see much as my eyes were blurry from the medicine but I was so relieved that Noah was OK. It wasn't until later in the day that I was able to see just how beautiful my little boy really is. When Michael finally handed him to me he kept opening his mouth and sticking out his tongue. It was too precious.
My family arrived shortly before noon. It was such a great moment to see everyone together and to watch everyone's reaction to meeting Noah. It still feels a little surreal to me.
Seeing Vanessa's reaction to meeting her little brother for the first time was priceless. She could not have been more thrilled. Noah bears a striking resemblence to her in so many ways -- he is Michael's "mini me" for sure. As far as looking anything like me, I disagree with my sisters who both think he looks like me but I must admit... he certainly was born with my hair!
At about a quarter to 7:00PM, Michael left to take Vanessa back to her mom. My family had gone a few minutes prior. So here I was, all alone with a newborn! Of course, what seemed to come so easy to me when I had so many people to help became the most challenging and difficult task. Fortunately the nurses were able to help me but only after I practically knocked down everything on the table near my bed to reach the phone and call them. Noah would not stop crying and I took as many deep breaths as I could and tried to stay calm. I was SO relieved when Michael returned!
This has definitely been the LONGEST day of my life and one which gave me the hugest blessing. Noah is asleep in his little plastic bassinet besides me and I'm wondering what it will be like to wake every 2 hours to feed him tonight. I am up for the challenge but for now it's time to sleep...
I cannot believe how much love I feel for something SO small. God is so great and we are SO blessed! (And for now...and surely for MANY days and nights to come... exhausted!)
Goodnight and thank you all for your prayers, your love and support.
Michael, Nancy, Vanessa & Noah Lunsford